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Her Story: Living With Chronic Kidney Disease

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Aberdeen chapter.

Her Story: Living With Chronic Kidney Disease

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Living with Chronic Kidney Disease was definitely the biggest shock to end 2016. Even with two grandparents sadly passing away in the same year, the morning I got told was a very chilly memory.Ā 

It was sort of one of those surreal experiences that you werenā€™t sure if it was a dream or not, but when your mum comes to talk about this article and the next sheā€™s found online you realise – ā€œgreat this is my life from now onā€.Ā 

But it was a slow process that showed early signs. The summer before, I had 3 urinary infections before they eventually realised I had a kidney infection. Then I started losing lots of weight (in the wrong season mind you), then silly stuff that people wouldnā€™t notice. I now have false eyelashes as my real ones all fell out; my nails break or fall off completely; my skin chips and there isnā€™t enough Neutrogena in the world to save it. All stuff that makes you feel quite less feminine. I put it down to being stressed with Uni and work, but in the months coming up to Christmas, I felt unwell far too often and would get sharp pains in my body. It would even get to a stage that every weekend an hour before work, I was struggling to go in. So I guess these little signs were there that you would never even think would be symptoms for a kidney disease.Ā 

I remember then I started googling, which I know is never what you should do because before you know it, you have stage 10 ā€˜Iā€™m gonna die right any secondā€™ disease. But joking aside, I was going home for Christmas and decided to get checked out. After a couple of blood tests and MRI scans, I had Chronic Kidney Disease, or CKD. To be honest, I really didnā€™t have much notion about the disease and perhaps a lot of people do but it was a real change to my life. I have subsequently became celiac and lactose intolerant (as well as already being a vegetarian), and I must admit, meal times are no longer fun; no salt = no cinema popcorn or crisps or basically anything. But it is helping because I was very much noticing shortness of breath and chest pains from simple stair case walks. Donā€™t get me wrong Iā€™ve always being a healthy person, so to find out that because one of my kidneys is failing, suddenly Iā€™m required without choice to make dietary requirements if I want to stay at stage 2.

But thatā€™s something Iā€™m struggling to deal with everyday. Sometimes I have those mornings, when my body starts bruising because my muscles are so sore and I just cry. Other mornings, I tell myself to put a brave face on and try to not let it keep controlling me. The sad part is it can control you. Iā€™ve noticed at times itā€™s stopped me from hanging out with friends because Iā€™ll need time to myself. While God knows I love to cry, I need to eventually come to grips that this is my life now. Itā€™s a process, and although I might wish I could rewind time, everyone comes to grips with life changes in their own time.

So I guess Iā€™ve written this article as a means of escape, as Iā€™m not sure if Iā€™ll ever be comfortable with the idea that Iā€™m a CKD patient, and being perfectly honest, not all my friends know. Itā€™s hard because what Iā€™ve found so far, once somebody knows, you get the sympathy look and while I appreciate peopleā€™s love and care, I just want to be treated as the same me before my life changed in December 2016.Ā