The stretch between your angst-ridden teens and settling down as a mature woman is a troubling time for many of us. This ‘inbetweeny’ stage in your life, where you still have no control over hormones, uni grades, career plans (or lack thereof) and the bazillion other things on my worry list. We spend sleepless nights tossing and turning while we panic about our future and currently non-existent babies, whether we’ll ever have the career of our dreams and not to mention worrying about what the hell is keeping our knight in shining armour from finding us. Then after all that, we get up in the morning, sleep deprived and grumpy, stare at ourselves in the mirror and wonder if this is really what being our ‘prime’ looks like. I mean seriously, it’s only going to go downhill from here. Personally, I am exhausted from thinking about a million and one things at once. Sometimes I think it would be so much easier just to run home to your parents’ house, revert to the foetal position and only rise from your hovel of ignorance for cups of tea – made by mum obviously – and digestive biscuits. The ‘Inbetweenies’ everybody, welcome to it.
I get quite worried that I am about a million life stages (no exaggeration) behind the people I went to school with. They all seem to be popping out sprogs and wearing diamond rings and I can’t even look after a basil plant.
University was supposed to open me up to the world and show me what was out there in the big, bad world, but after four years I have to ask myself: has university set me back in life? Ambition really seemed like good idea when I was 17 and there was nothing on my horizon except four years at uni I know how useful [enter degree here] is going to be in my career as a [enter something completely different here]. There then lies the ever present – and terrifying – question of whether or not I’m even going to get a job after slogging away for four years? It’s a pretty tricky situation having none of the life experience or skills that high-end companies are looking for. The rare companies who claim that they’re looking for ‘hip and trendy’ young peepz still need your some experience and dedication, not to mention the hard work they require if you actually get the job. I don’t want to be a negative Nancy, but I’m pretty certain most jobs don’t let you skip a shift for an impromptu lunch date with the girls, or not pay attention in a meeting because you’re still hungover from said lunch date. That said, if you do manage find a job like this, then please tell me. PLEASE.
Even in the rare moments when you feel positive and sure that someone, somewhere will recognise your talent of [insert here] and offer you the job of your dreams, there’s still the nagging feeling of time slipping past you. Okay so you might possibly get that dream job, but what about the Harry Winston sparkler you’ve had your eye on since you were 16? What about that baby from the Pamper’s ad that was so cute you almost cried? STOP RIGHT THERE. 1. Weddings cost money (A LOT of money) 2. Babies cost money (ALL of the money). Where does this money come from? The dream job that you didn’t accept because you were worried about popping out a sprog and busy getting yourself up to the eyeballs in debt just for a Vera Wang meringue? I think not. Although I’m pretty sure I am quite happy currently unmarried (as this is not 1930), my hormones still have an unfortunately large say in what I think and feel. I see a baby and, while I totally recognise its resemblance to a rooster potato, my ovaries explode inside me and steer my hips towards totally unacceptable man-boys. Resulting in a bitter cycle of gin, wine and more gin. Perhaps not something a respectable, mature, young lady like myself should be indulging in… every Friday night.
From all this ranting you might not think it, but this inbetweeny stage does in fact have serious advantages. I have no money? WHO CARES, hellllllo mum and dad and thank you for your credit card. I get to live with my best friends who also enjoy wallowing in wine and gin and more gin. A serious perk to not owning my million pound mansion, I must admit. I’m pretty sure my future (imaginary) husband, four kids, two dogs and three chickens would not appreciate mummy passed out in a gin and Cadbury’s coma twice a week. Okay… I don’t have my own house and yes I pay a lot of rent and yes it seems that I will be paying a lot of rent for the next 50 years, but decorating a house in Laura Ashley isn’t the be all and end all is it? Okay, well it is, but not right now… Mostly because I can’t afford Laura Ashley anything right now. At the end of the day, we will be frowned upon once we graduate for getting blinding drunk twice a week, not on a weekend *gasp*, SO LETS ENJOY IT. We could all let the pipe dream of white dresses, dream jobs and a cottage in the country cloud our vision, but at the end of the day that can totally be done in ten years time. We’ve still got time. This may be the only era of our lives that we can be selfish in our decisions and not have a Visa bill to pay! Just a student overdraft to dig ourselves out of… lol? Let’s all take a moment to appreciate the fact we can still go home after a day in Uni, pour ourselves a large glass of low priced wine and dance around in our pyjamas singing Spice Girls (Wanna Be, of course) with our best friends. You may not have a life plan yet, and our inbetweeny age may seem like a pit of diamond-less despair, but ladies we have tea, we have gin and by god we have good friends… We’re going to be fine. Drunk, but fine.