When my sister graduated college she packed her bags and moved across the country.
Though she went to school four hours away from me, I did not seem to notice her absence then. Maybe it was because we were in the same state, maybe it was because I was in high school and had distractions (and maybe liked a bit of distance from another mother figure). Whatever it was, I can see now that distance makes the heart grow fonder. My sister and I were close growing up, but as we both are forming into new adult versions of ourselves, we have to work in order to maintain our relationship. Here are some ways we have stayed connected over the last few years being over 2,000 miles apart.
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1. Send Care Packages
My sister is really awesome with these. My mom may be to blame for this one because we receive packages from her for every holiday. My sister does not necessarily like gifts (she is very selective and minimalistic), but for her birthday one year I helped pick out an edible arrangement for her. I am getting ready to send her some coffee beans that she can try, as she is a connoisseur. But even simple things like a card every once in awhile make a huge difference. I remember getting a card randomly that said “you are a rare bird” it was a beautiful card that I ended up framing and putting up in my room. Another time she sent me a card congratulating me on a job I am taking on after graduation, going one step further than just a phone call. Things like this are also a great way to communicate thought that may not be as easily said in person. I think my sister and I both try to keep our emotions under control around one another but sometimes that keeps us from saying things we really feel. Saying things like; I am proud of you, I really miss you, I wish in some aspects I could be more like you or you’ll never understand how all around beautiful and amazing you are. These considerations can be communicated by a simple gestures.
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2. Schedule FaceTime Dates/Phone Calls
LA traffic is real, and when my sister isn’t making the most of it with her favorite podcasts, she’ll sometimes call me. Being in different times zones sometimes makes communication even more complex but letting the other know hours of availability helps when fitting in time to catch up. We love to use FaceTime, especially for exciting or entertaining news. Sometimes it is not the most convenient but when you face faces as expressive as ours it makes all the difference. I am always excited to hear from my sister especially on weeks that I have been stressed, when I need advice, or when something only we would find funny happened.
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3. Send Memes
My sister and I are very different but one thing that always keeps us connected is our humor. We both think we are respectively funny enough, and one of our favorite ways to communicate is through memes. Meme culture is something most of us millennials can relate to but when we find an obscure one only we would relate to, we don’t hesitate to share. A meme from my sister makes my day anytime I get one. The great thing about these are, unlike a phone call, you can keep them in your archives and also won’t feel bad for not seeing them right away.
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4. Share Beauty Tips
Whenever trying a new product we inform the other if they should make a purchase or not waste their time. I use more makeup products than my sister and have shared my favorite lipstick colors, eye shadow palettes and foundations. She is always keeping me up on the best health and skin care routines. She has taught me how to make my own coconut oil scrub as well as helped cut down a complicated skin care routine to be the most effective. Anyway we can help each other become more confident in our beauty without doing harm or changing who we are is a success. Sharing information about these products is a great way to have fun while also saving some dollars.
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5. Do Projects Together
Being on opposite sides of the country does not limit the amount of things we can accomplish together. My sister came across a website designed by one of her favorite podcasters selfauthoring.com. It guides you in writing about your past, present and future. When she bought her program it came with a second one free. Now we both are working on finishing the program. It is a great way to connect to each other and ourselves. Even DIY projects can be great for letting out creativity and might even inspire some laughs. Another great way to stay connected would be to start a blog with your sister! Expressing two different perspectives on the same topic can lead to new knowledge about the other.
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6. Plan A Trip
No doubt planning a trip, especially one where you are traveling a long distance can be stressful and expensive, but with some saving and budgeting it is doable! Since my sister has been gone we have seen each other at least once a year. For my 21st we celebrated in LA (where she lives) and it was amazing. Last week I took a trip to the coast and visited Seattle and Portland, we met up at the airport. We spent a week looking at graduate schools in both cities while filling each other in on all that we have been up to in the last few months.
Setting aside times to see each other do not have to be extravagant or even long, but spending quality time just the two of you can be extremely special. I am fortunate enough to have an intelligent, organized and selfless big sister that has made itineraries for our trips and made them possible. Figuring out the details of the trip can be fun for both parties if a point is made of doing things you both would like to do with your time. The adventures that took place on our trips are unforgettable and play a great role in our bond.
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7. Tell Them You Love Them
Not to be dramatic, but our time here on earth is so fragile and limited. The most important thing above all is to tell your sister how much you love them! There are few loves greater than that of a sibling and letting yours know how truly inspiring they are to you only strengths that reality. If you have a sibling that is even half as great as mine, let them know how valued they are by dropping the L bomb on them as much as possible. To my sister if you’re reading this- thanks for all you have done, are doing and will do. I love you to the moon and back.