Most of us have been there. That moment when your ex SO implies that he or she is with someone else or you see his or her Facebook relationship status change to “in a relationship.” It doesn’t matter whether they ended things or you did. If you truly cared for that person, it might hurt just a little bit. Or more.
So, what do you do? Cry in bed with a jar of Nutella and binge watch your favorite television shows or movies on your laptop? No. That’s no good. Not only is eating Nutella by the spoonfuls unhealthy, but it is entirely unproductive to sit in bed all day or most of the day, especially when you have other obligations to attend to, classes and homework.
What can you do that will help you move on as your ex SO has already done and feel good?
Talk to friends.
You need to open up about your feelings and not keep them bottled up inside. It’ll really help to vent your feelings. True friends will understand and let you be a shoulder to cry on or comfort you. These friends don’t have to be just your girl friends. They can be your guy friends as well. Your guy friends might give you a different view, one that you might not have realized. You don’t want to be limited in who you talk to. Talk to as many friends as you can, as much as you can.
Keep a journal.
Whether you don’t want to voice your feelings just yet, or you have already been voicing your feelings, you should consider keeping a journal. Keeping a journal is always a good idea. You can get a really cute one from Kate Spade, Lily Pulitzer, our Her Campus store, the bookstore on campus, and a million other places. If you keep a journal, you can physically see your feelings after you write them down, you can see how you are dealing day to day. You can log whether or not you thought about your ex S.O. that day or what you did that day. Write down the happy moments that you experienced throughout the day. You don’t want to look back and see only sadness and hurt. You’re trying to move on and be strong here. You’re trying to pull through and come out on top, and writing only about your sadness and hurt will hinder your progress.
Get out there.
You don’t have to jump into the dating scene right away. In fact, you probably shouldn’t. You should just be available (unless you have homework that you must get done that is–then you are very unavailable). You should be available to any and all of your friends. If one of your best friends wants to go see a movie, go see it if you have time. If one of your guy friends wants to study for a test, by all means, study. The more you get out there and keep busy (but not too busy), the more you’ll forget about your ex, and that is what you need to do. You need to forget about this person, at least until you can move on yourself.
Be happy.
In this hard time, you want to be as happy as you can be. To do this, you should be around and talk to people that make you happy, that make you smile. Literally, delete the toxic people in your life. You don’t need anyone to bring you down right now. Heck, no one needs anyone to bring them down, ever. If someone is only posting negative things, either don’t look at what they’re posting or unfriend them right now. Keep those people on your newsfeed, in your life that one look at anything they post, one short conversation, or one look from them can make you smile. You need to smile right now. So smile. Do things you love. If you love to cook, cook as much as you can with the time that you have available. If you love to play soccer, play soccer all night. If you love to read, read for fun in your free time (unless you’re reading with classes). Do whatever makes you happy. You deserve it.