My friends from LA are in town. Their past trips have been an experience to say the least. Freshman year, my best friend Irina came to visit and had the chance to experience U of A pre-dark days AKA when it was like Mexico here and fraternities weren’t getting kicked off the row every other month. My friend Lauren, who is also in town, visited during FIJI dad’s weekend. I’m not even going to get into that evening. And my friend Nicole has visited but she has never stayed with me.
Nicole and Lauren go to UCLA and Irina goes to USC so I thought that for my last hurrah they should come and experience the U of A. I tried to prepare them as best I could before they got here. Bring the Arizona uniform which consists of heels, high waisted skirt, silk top, and sling over bags.
           We stopped by a fun PG, went to the Dubliner and took a Harry Potter Shot, then ended the evening at Dirtbags. It was fab. I thought it would be a good idea to take rubber duckies…big mistake and I’m paying for it today. We went home and needed a little late night snack. After we ordered our Papa John’s there was a knock on the door. Who would be knocking on our door at 3:30 AM? Oh, it was our next-door neighbor Tracey who I’m pretty sure is a crack addict. Like, actually.
           We know very little about the dynamic in Tracey’s household. My window faces their backyard and there is always a topless man. It is not a pretty sight. The man Tracey lives with is her deceased husbands friend, allegedly. The cops have had to come to the house a few times for domestic disputes… oh and they nearly set our house on fire. Their backyard shed caught on fire and 10-foot flames were shooting up at 8 AM one morning.
           So Tracey is holding her dog and my sympathetic friend Megan says “Are you okay?” She goes on this rant about how Mike broke her 52’ TV and how he beats her up. What? So we said, “do you want us to call the police?” I’m pretty sure she was on some type of drug, and refused to call the police. The whole situation started to get out of hand when she started crying and said that she needed to see a mirror. She had handed Megan her dog because “she thought she would have to go away for awhile and knew that it would be safe” at our house. Then things started to get really weird when she touched Megan’s head in the bathroom and said, “You are so beautiful, so kind, so smart and I hope you find a wonderful man.” At this point our other roommate Katie- Sue stepped in and kicked Tracey out. I thought she was going to pull a knife on her. She reluctantly left and I came back into the living room where my friends faces were in pure and utter shock. Just a casual Friday dealing with our crack head neighbors. Welcome to Tucson.Â