Whether you’re a proud tweeter or just getting used to the “twitterverse”, there are just some accounts that need to grace your “Following” list. If you need a good laugh, or are looking for a Twitter account that just “gets” you, use this list as a guide to spicing up your Twitter timeline.
10. @PreschoolGems: Out of the mouths of babies. Who doesn’t love toddlers? Okay, maybe not all of us are good with children, but you can’t deny that kids really do say the darndest things. This account, run by a preschool teacher, quotes the weird, funny and questionable things said by her students every day. It makes me wish that putting crayons up my nose was still socially acceptable in college.
9. @shitgirlssay: We’ve all seen the “Sh*t Girls Say” and its many parodies in the past weeks, but this account existed long before the video. Simple, short phrases of things girls say are posted here daily. You might think that you can’t relate to this account, but once you start reading tweets like “I was just about to call you.” and “That’s so funny, because you actually look like a Molly.”, you’ll realize that we all really do say this “sh*t”.
8. @BeyonceJayFetus: If you have to follow anyone on Twitter, let it be the fake account of the child of Beyonce and Jay-Z. If this account is any sort of foreshadowing to what their child will grow up to be, then Beyonce and Jay-Z deserve an award.
7. @FriendFromHS: It’s funny because it’s true. Whether you’re one year out of high school or twenty, this account is probably relevant to your life. There are few words to adequately explain this account, so just visit it and realize how true it is.
6. @FakeAPStylebook: For my fellow journalism students, you’ll greatly appreciate this account. If you’re like most of us, you are confused by/loathe AP style. This account does what all of us want to: parodies the AP stylebook and is good for a laugh when we’re struggling to write. If only this was the real stylebook, life (and journalism) would be so much more fun.
5. @PrincessProbz: This account is for the little brat in all of us. Granted, some (if not many) tweets are a little over the top, but some are so relatable. For instance, I don’t know if I ever resonated with a tweet more than when @PrincessProbz tweeted “I’m pretty sure my bloodstream is 78% Diet Coke.” When I realized how true that was to my life, it may or may not have lead to the stopping of my Diet Coke consumption, but it’s still true for probably 99% of college females.
4. @TCLutz: While most of these accounts are good for a laugh, I couldn’t help but put this guy up here. He tweets all sorts of uplifting quotes, scripture verses, and his tweets are guaranteed to make you smile. This might be a huge ploy on his part to make girls fall in love with him, and if so, it’s working. Who doesn’t love a sweet Southern gentleman?
3. @totalbetchmove: Much different from @PrincessProbz, this account is for the hot mess. No matter how much we want to deny it, we can all relate to at least one “Total Betch Move”, and we all have “betch” moods from time to time.
2. @JewBoyProblems: This account will make little to no sense to you unless you’re Jewish, but for my tribe sisters and brothers: you’ll love this. There are tons of “JAP” accounts as well, but “JewBoy” really hits home with his tweets about bagels, his bubbe, and camp.
1. @SurisBurnBook: Also a popular Tumblr account, Suri’s Burn Book is the most adorably rude account to grace the internet. Read Suri’s complaints, gossip and drama about her parents (who she calls by their first names) and other small celebrity children.