Everyone has their “niche”. Where one girl has a knack for volleyball, another has the natural ability to hang a spoon from her nose. There should never be any shame in where your interests lie, but sometimes, sharing those wacky recreations with the public (which has become, at large, a harshly judgmental society) can be daunting. As a personal project, I have decided to create a weekly confessional journal that allows these individuals to anonymously share their interests, life experiences and beyond that they otherwise would shy away from expressing to the public.
Please note that in this article, the actual name of our interviewee is kept private. For the sake of simplicity to the reader, her alias will be kept “Mary”.
We begin with our first confession from an anonymous Arkansas college student, “Mary”. She loves being involved with her sorority on Campus, frequently hangs out with her friends on and off campus, and considers herself a talented individual.
“I feel embarrassed when when I talk about it,” Mary says, regarding her secret interest. “None of my friends really do the same thing, but I mean, I was never really afraid to talk about it until I came to college and I felt like I would be judged.”
When you attend a large-scale University, interests are diverse. Finding the right crowd to be around is the hardest part, but Mary often finds it difficult to approach even the people who she feels would accept her hobby, in fear that they will reject her other interests like playing tennis and her weekly ritual of “Starbucks every Thursday morning”. The hardest part of the interview process for Mary was her confession. As she fiddles with her pen, she finds it difficult to word her admission. “It’s almost like girls have set roles on campus, especially if you’re part of a sorority or something…I mean, my confession is that I really love video games. It’s just hard to break the girly-girl act in front of your friends. You don’t know what they’ll say to you.”
Mary has been a part of her sorority for three years; she doesn’t necessarily feel like her friends would judge her, but she’s always had a lingering feeling that someone might think differently of her. “In a perfect world, I could say that I don’t feel nervous about opening up — even if it’s honestly not even a big deal. Everyone is a little afraid of feeling different. I don’t believe anyone who says otherwise.”
Despite the apprehensive feeling that Mary fights to overcome, she says that she isn’t sorry that she has a hobby not many girls have. “I think it’s fun! Honestly, I bet a lot people have hobbies that they don’t talk about.” Mary smiles, and laughs at her following statement. “I kind of like keeping it to myself most of the time, because at least I won’t have to worry about people wanting to come over and learn how to play. I’m not a good teacher — or sharer.”
Mary confesses that she has played video games since she was in middle school, when her brother first introduced her to a game called Runescape, and she had a blast watching him play. “The whole goal of the game was so complicated, it was like learning another language. But then you feel accomplished when you figure it out, and you can play with other people around the world. I don’t really get why some people don’t think that isn’t fun.”
Mary divides her time studying and hanging out with friends. She admits that she only plays when she has a lot of free time. “My job is to come here and learn, and everyone needs a break now and then. It’s a better alternative to anything destructive on a Saturday night.”
Mary feels like her hobby brings her and her brother closer together, and she enjoys when he visits. “I think he’s coming again in October. We’ve already planned a Black Ops tournament against each other.”
“Who do you think will win?” I asked Mary.
“Probably him. I never said I was actually any good at many games.” Mary laughs.