Let’s talk some serious stuff for Valentine’s Day: crushes.
Altogether, they feel like a smack to the face, a marathon to the middle of who knows where, and if someone decided to give you the warmest hug in the world. Talk about complicated.
The truth is…crushes are….a lot. Hell, for me they’re crazy from the very beginning . One time, I thought I was good, starting fresh, leaving my baggage at the door, but THEN…it happened. Our eyes met across the hallway and there was this huge smile and subsequent wave. Just like that, I knew I was screwed. My heart rate rose to the rate of a drum roll, my palms became wet with sweat, and I forgot how to breathe for a hot second. When they were gone, I dragged myself out the building and sunk my shoulders in defeat. All I could think was, well, there goes my plans for a peaceful year.
But also, I gotta admit it–crushes can feel pretty awesome too. They’re like that song you decide hearing once simply isn’t enough. (And twice? Still not enough!) You have to hear it 500 times: every day, every hour, because, for some strange reason, it’s got this addicting tune you can’t stop replaying in your head. As corny as love songs that talk about love being a drug are, they’re not entirely wrong.
Don’t you ever find yourself slipping your crush’s name into conversation whenever you can? Or secretly trying to run into them on campus (that’s not just me, right?). It really is no surprise because you (and your bastard of a brain) have a craving for dopamine. You know, that feel-good chemical we just can’t seem to get enough of that sometimes entices us to make not-so-smart choices. (Like word-vomiting at your crush on a daily basis.) It’s painful, I know, but it’s that damn dopamine and a dozen other chemicals that seem to have made their life goal embarrassing you in some way. I might as well have my siblings in my head.
But, it’s sort of comforting that science has a part in making us crazy during these crushing times (see what I did there?). Our hormones can be all over the place, especially as youngins who have no idea what the heck we’re doing. So yeah, crushes are a mess. We’re a mess. But isn’t that kind of awesome?
They remind us to
- Have fun in life
- Take stupid risks (on occasion)
- See that there are pretty incredible people in this world
So I guess in their own way, crushes teach us little nuggets of life wisdom without too much of the heartbreak or high stakes. We’re just kids trying to get our crap together, and crushes are sometimes stepping stones to get somewhere too. They’re one-sided lessons, but hell, do they feel huge at times! We feel sad for a bit, but then we learn and we’re up and at it again! Trust me, despite the frequency with which I have had a crush attack, I do learn something from every one of them. Sometimes you find out that crushes aren’t really the greatest of friends, or you realize they’re just like any flawed human with a relatively cool sense of fashion. (Seriously. I think I like people with brilliant fashion sense because I severely lack in that department.)
But before I start rambling on about my non-existent fashion, let’s celebrate this Valentine’s Day for not solely the relationships, but also for the crushes that teach us a lot more than we think they can. If you have one now, just roll with the punches and try to keep yourself away from obsessing too much. There are lessons waiting to be learned and maybe even future relationships in the making, but just know, visiting them at midnight when you’re high on dopamine is probably never a good idea. Besides that, keep crushing! Both literally and metaphorically.