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How To Be a Radical Feminist and a Trophy Wife at the Same Time

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at BC chapter.

 

Disclaimer: 

Some people say that you can’t have it all.  Stop, and ignore those idiots.  They have it all wrong.  You can have it all from the career to the relationship with Mr. Soon-To-Be-Husband.  Just listen to these few steps, and you can have the perfect life too.

 

1.  Never get any sleep.

Who needs sleep nowadays?  Between your job, classes, friends, and your perfect boyfriend, you will be far too busy to even put your head down for a minute.  Instead, consume anything with caffeine in it because it pretty much will be your life force.  (Just to make sure that you don’t get any stains on your teeth, make sure to carry bleach strips everywhere with you, and apply them several times a day).

2.  Be motivated because giving up is not an option.

You have to get everything done no matter what it is if you want everything to be perfect.  Never put off anything like essays, having lunch with a friend, or spending time with your boyfriend.  You live your life for others and to make others happy.  Keep going because everyone is counting on you.  No pressure or anything.

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3.  Never be selfish, especially when it comes to your job and your boyfriend.

Relationships are not about equal partnership.  They are always about you giving and the other part taking.  Your relationship with your job should be one in which you work without expecting to get any respect or compensation for your hard work.  The same applies to your boyfriend.  Expect to give up yourself entirely to him because that is what it means to be a good girlfriend.  Why should you care about whether you are happy?  The happiness of others should be the only thing that counts.

4.  Be happy all the time.

No one likes a Debbie-Downer.  Keep a smile on your face because you do not want people to worry about you.  It is your job to worry about others, not the other way around, you silly.  So if the world seems to be crashing down around you (which it shouldn’t be if you listened to my previous steps), do it with a smile even if you want to kill somebody.  Just remember, when you’re smiling, the whole world smiles too.

 

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5.  Read Her Campus BC.

This should be your only source of information because we only publish articles that tell you how to be an extreme feminist and a submissive female.  Since there are no other subjects for girls to talk about, we stick to them.  College girls have no interest in movies, food, or politics, so why attempt to talk about them?

Follow these easy steps, and you too can have everything.  People will wonder in awe of your magical ability to be both at the same time.  When they ask what’s your secret, just let them know that this article contains all the advice you will ever need.

HAPPY APRIL FOOL’S DAY!!!!

 

Image Sources:

http://www.frhuman.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/87ac95c8e63824f11a6daa6de4a58660.jpg

http://data.whicdn.com/images/9427952/image-5aafec5cfc95925d365e347f9a6cc79c-anne-taintor-cards-021_large.jpg

http://theirondaisywrites.files.wordpress.com/2012/12/anne-taintor.jpg?w=500&h=500

http://static.someecards.com/someecards/usercards/1347727058561_9396375.png

http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/23225445.jpg

 

 

Danica is a senior at Boston College and is a History major with an Irish Studies minor.  She is originally from Greenwich, CT and moved to East Boothbay, ME.  She is also a member of Boston College Irish Dance and the Shaw Leadership Program.  And last but not least is a fiery redhead who lives in a dragon-guarded castle surrounded by a boiling lake of lava! But don't let that cool you off. She's a loaded pistol who likes piña coladas and getting caught in the rain. Yours for the rescuing: Princess Danica!  (And yes, that is a quote from Shrek...)
Caitlin is currently a student at Boston College studying English and Pre-Law.  At BC, she is a member of the Boston College Irish Dance Club, on the Honors Program Student Executive Board's Community Service Committee, and interns and writes for the fashion and culture blog Rusted Revolution.  She has been wriring for Her Campus BC since Jaunary 2011 and is serving as BC's Campus Correspondent for the 2012-2013 school year.  Outside of school, she is a competitive Irish dancer, and has been dancing for 18 years. During her high school career, she completed an engineering project at Case Western Reserve University that made her one of 40 Intel Science Talent Search Finalists in 2009.   In addition to all of this, Caitlin loves reading, yoga, running, shopping, spending time with friends and family, and traveling.