“Hundreds of years of inequality for us and with this one app suddenly guys are all in a fuss! Like men didn’t do the same exact thing in their gentlemen’s clubs… Yeah, it wasn’t extended to as large a network as Facebook, but still.” But still, what? Of course men have done the same thing, but apologies for the cliché, but since when did two wrongs make a right?
What concerns me more than men fussing over this app is that women do not find it more appalling. Why have we fought so hard against female objectification? Because objectification itself is wrong. I understand that Lulu has a review system to prevent extreme bashing or slander, but regardless of that precaution an app like Lulu reiterates that shallow rating systems, and making personal information a public entertainment are okay. It seems hypocritical that women would feel good about doing the same things that we complain about men doing. Furthermore, women are supposed to find it empowering. What is empowering about talking about a boy, positive or negative, on a social media app that he cannot even see? I would think the empowering act would be to have the courage to tell him how you feel upfront. We don’t need to hide behind anonymity.
I am a feminist, and I have sincere issues with the Lulu app being called a “feminist’s dream.” My hopes are for an environment of equality, and one that fosters respect for all people. Equality means perceiving a person as a human being, not what you perceive their gender to be. Call me an old-fashioned idealist, but I thought the best way to learn about a man is to spend time with him. Every relationship is a unique one, and you can never know the full context of a man’s relationship with anyone else except for yourself. Let’s give ourselves enough credit that we can call them how we see them, and that we are strong enough not to let a jerk get under our skin if we make a bad call. Yeah, learning the hard way might make us more vulnerable, but vulnerability is also how to form the most fulfilling and sincere connections with another person.
***This response was submitted by a member of the class of 2013 as a response to an earlier blog post on the Lulu App. Thank you for your feedback!