The cutest (or worst, depending) holiday has come and gone; boxes of chocolates are half off, flowers are starting to wilt, and your Instagram feeds are no longer full of couples and pinks and reds. Some people may think that Valentine’s Day is a cheesy holiday but I think that spending a day revolving around love is good. We often take for granted the people around us that we love, and I’ve learned that it’s important to take the time to show them how we really feel. I know firsthand that taking love for granted ruins relationships and friendships, so for me, Valentine’s Day is all about really showing the love you feel for the people close to you: the love that you don’t always showcase.
As single girls in college, many people find Valentine’s Day depressing without having a boy to take them to a fancy dinner and bring them flowers and chocolates. That would normally have been my mentality too. This year, however, I used Valentine’s Day to show my friends and family how much they mean to me. I am certainly guilty of taking the love of my family and friends for granted sometimes, and I wanted them to see how much I appreciate them and all that they do for me. While I may not have had a boy to take me on a date this Valentine’s Day, I still celebrated the holiday by leaving notes for my friends on their pillows, telling my family how much I appreciate and love them, and watching a movie and drinking wine with my best friends. Honestly, I couldn’t think of a more perfect Valentine’s Day. I am just beginning to realize that love is not just found in a boyfriend, but in everyone that cares for you.
This season of love has made me think more about dating in a college environment. I think that the majority of college students focus on hookups instead of investing themselves in a real relationship. I just wonder happened to old-fashioned dating: meeting someone you like and asking them on a simple date, instead of getting booty calls every weekend. We can sometimes focus more on looks and how much someone goes out and parties when picking a hookup buddy, but what happened to focusing on whether someone is genuine? Intelligent? Passionate? Do these things not matter anymore? I will admit, as a girl, I tend to focus on the role that boys have in this hookup culture, and dismiss the role that us girls play. Personally, I know that a lot of girls, myself included, tend to go for the “bad boys” because there is something about their (not so nice) personality that makes us fall for them. Every. Time. When a guy is actually nice, many girls dismiss this boy as being creepy, and return to falling into the vicious cycle of hooking up with the bad boys. I think that this tendency definitely contributes to the hookup culture that is dominating our generation. Boys certainly do play their (significant) part in it as well however.
Last week, I wrote an article about the “romantic” gestures from the boys of BC. Some of these included: “when he sends you a Facebook invite to his pregame in Walsh, when he tells you how pretty you are in a crowded Mod, when he likes your Instagram and assumes that’s all he has to do to show he’s interested, when he Snapchats you to hangout but doesn’t text you, and when he texts you past midnight that he misses you even though you just saw him last night.” While this article was satirical, there was definitely some truth to it. I am not blaming boys for this, because I think there is an immense pressure put on guys to focus on getting with the hottest girl at a party and dismiss their emotions towards anyone. This type of behavior is praised (for a guy) in our generation, and this is because of the hookup culture we have all gotten used to. Boys don’t usually ask girls on dates anymore, and this pattern continues because girls keep falling for the behavior that guys are encouraged to portray. I know that I speak for more than just myself when I say that the hookup culture is not satisfying, and I am always left wanting something more real.
This Valentine’s Day, I realized that the notion of romantic love is often lost in our current hookup culture and is replaced with liquid courage and texts past midnight. I would like to see a change in our generation’s idea of dating, and a realization in the true meaning and beauty of love. Whether it is love for a significant other or love for a friend, love is a beautiful thing, and I hope that we aren’t losing that.
Sources:
http://cdn1.theodysseyonline.com/files/2016/01/30/635897217705134440-758132465_hand%20heart.jpg
http://www.relatably.com/q/img/quotes-about-family-strength-tumblr/love-…