It’s a common phrase on Boston College’s campus: “Take Back The Night.” When is this year’s Take Back the Night? Are you going to Take Back The Night? What happens at Take Back the Night? It’s a phrase we are all used to – definitely more so than other colleges – but how many of us truly understand what Take Back The Night is and does?
Until I went to Take Back The Night for my first time this year, I wasn’t really sure what happened at this popular event. I pictured an emotional night filled with several speakers, a crowd of women, and dialogue about sexual assault – and I wasn’t necessarily wrong in most regards. However, it’s a lot more than that, too.
Firstly, it wasn’t only women supporting women. I would say it was about 60/40 (completely eye-balling this ratio) of women to men in attendance, and I was pleasantly surprised at the number of men that turned out for the event. There was a portion of the night where the men all stood up, gathered at the platform, and made a pledge to end violence and assault. Although I could see how this may confuse some, seeing how men don’t necessarily always cause assault, this moment touched me. Many assaulters are men – mine was – and I believe it took a lot of courage for these college guys to stand up and promise to help end violence and assault in front of a group of women who are so deeply affected by the issue. This act gives another form of hope for women and girls – and other men – affected by sexual assault; it is comforting to know that there are people taking a stand.
Secondly, TBTN was, as I imagined, a night of dialogue about sexual assault. While this may make some students uncomfortable because it is such a touchy subject, the Women’s Resource Center and a large number of other organizations worked together to make a sensitive subject talked about openly in public. So public that it was in the quad outside of O’Neill; even if you weren’t in attendance, you could still hear what was going on. There were three speakers, a professor and two students, who each shared their personal stories of how assault has affected them in their lives. Hearing them speak so honestly about their own struggles opens up the floor to dialogue and allows others to open up as well.
Thirdly, SANET nurses and advocates were stationed around the quad and were available to anyone who needed help. It was amazing to see so many people who are trained and willing to assist in fighting both against violence and for the empowerment of those who have been affected by assault.
Finally, yes, it was definitely emotional. Whether or not there were tears by all, the stories were definitely hard to hear. They demanded action. So, why were so many men and women in attendance? Because they want to fight violence. And because, probably, they have been affected by sexual assault in some way. We tend to forget that sexual assault does not hurt a singular victim but can affect anyone – family members, friends, teachers, coworkers, and more. People cope in different ways – but we all unite for the same cause.
During one girl’s speech, she described my own situation with assault perfectly, and it took everything I had not to completely break down. I was crying at the flashbacks that brought me back to my own night of assault, crying at the fact that she had to experience the same pain I went through, and crying at the realization of the unlikeable person I had become immediately following the assault. At the same time, though, I felt relieved. Relieved that my friends were there to hold my hand. Relieved that I was recovering. Relieved to hear these girls’ stories. Relieved that maybe I wasn’t alone. Despite the horror I went through – I would not wish it on anyone else – it was helpful for my personal recovery to hear someone else explain word-for-word what I felt and to see hundreds of people there in support of each other. Take Back The Night proves to me that we as BC students must, and do, work as a community to fight the violence that plagues so many of us each and every day.
Photo Sources:
http://www.bc.edu/offices/wrc/programs/CARE_Week/take-back-the-night.html
http://titleix.ucr.edu/assault/assault.html
http://thewellwrittenwoman.com/sexual-assault-time-to-come-to-the-defense-of-women/#.U0crLVzpiDU
http://www.raisinggenerationstoday.com/reach-out-for-hope-by-stacey-thacker/
http://www.gaates.org/aic/41000.html