I joined the Facebook page just like everyone else. I followed countless Instagram accounts and added Snapchat username after Snapchat username. I thought I had all my bases covered when I stepped foot onto campus for the first time. In my naive state of mind all I would have to do would be look left and right and then back to the left to have my new friends appear – looking back, it would be fair to say that the idea of starting the year with a handful of friends got hit by a metaphorical truck.
Luck would have it that my roommate was someone I stalk searched online and we were fast friends, but she had her own schedule and plans that very rarely aligned with what was going on in my day.
It was the end of week one in my new life and at this point I convinced myself that no one else could possibly have friends. I mean, when did I even have time to talk to anyone from class? Everyone gets there around 5 minutes before the professor starts in on their lecture and as soon as it ends everyone picks up to get to the next part of their day. Yet, as I sat alone in the caf–not for the first time that week- I casually scrolled through the Instagram posts and Snapchat stories of everyone I added from the Facebook page.
Utter shock. Post after post of “So happy to get to spend the next four years with these people”, “These girls are my life”. Story after story of hilarious midnight adventures and car rides that involved my favorite sport: karaoke.
The posts had me questioning everything. Week one of college and I was terrified. I knew rationally that this was only a handful of extremely outgoing girls with a personality type completely different from my own. Irrationally: I came to the conclusion that I would be alone forever.Â
At this point I decided to push past the initial feelings of complete loneliness and do something about it. I became the girl that talked to the person next to me for 5 minutes before class. I became the girl that reached out to people that I might have connected with- even just for a moment- at orientation or welcome week. I became the girl I would have never been in high school or in the town that I spent my whole life in. I found confidence in my anonymity and, in a way, Nashville.
With this new attitude and outlook, I found things starting to look up. I began collecting the Instagram and Snapchat accounts of people I knew from more than just a Facebook post. These faces began to become familiar, both online and off. It may not have been the fastest way to make friends. It left me working on homework in my room on a holiday weekend and eating a few more meals alone in the caf, but it gave me friends that were based on face to face interaction. Friends that I am now going to meet for dinner as I finish this post.
My advice for anyone still searching for that one friend or that group of friends: put yourself out there. Breathe in. Breathe out. Ask the person their name, their major, their hometown. The rest will be history.
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