Feeling Lonely? Me too. My Guide to Making New Friends

It’s a tale as old as time. You start your freshman year, thrilled to meet new people and make a hundred friends. Then, the year goes on, and you realize the friendships you made at the beginning aren’t necessarily good ones. Maybe you got lucky and stayed friends with the same people from the start, but perhaps you realized it didn’t work out, and you’re stuck feeling alone. 

If the latter is you, me too. So what can you do? Here is a list of tips and tricks to help you meet new people and turn surface-level friendships into something deeper.

How to Meet New People:

Meeting new people can be the most intimidating part of making new friends, especially when it feels like everyone already has established friend groups. 

My first tip is to remember that you are not alone. If you need new friends, I guarantee other people are feeling similarly. Social anxiety can be a monster that prevents you from putting yourself out there. But the worst thing that could happen is that one person doesn’t want to be friends with you. And if that happens, you can simply move on and search for someone new.  

But how do you actually meet these new people? One of the great things about Bentley is the many different ways to get involved on campus. You can join Her Campus and meet an incredible community of girls. You can also get a job on campus (I recommend the BSLCE; I have met some of the best people on campus through it). There are hundreds of clubs, and all of them are super welcoming; they want to invite you in. 

But what if a club or a job isn’t right for you? Classes are another great way to meet new people. Group projects can be a pain but can also be a door to making new friends. I met one of my best friends in a class just by chatting before and after class. I recommend talking to the people in your groups, talking to the people who sit next to you, or making connections with someone after class. A small compliment (like “I love your outfit”) can go so far in making new friends. Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there. 

Another good way to make more friends is through mutual friends. Ask people you’re close with to introduce you to some of their friends. It may feel like you can’t join new friend groups, but that is not always the case. Some people want to diversify their friend groups, and they would welcomingly introduce you to their current friends. 

How to Make Your Friendships Deeper:

So you’ve made new friends. You’ve got some people you say hi to in the halls and chat with during class. But how do you take those friendships from the surface level to friends you can trust with your life? Well, I can’t promise you’ll be able to trust them with your deepest, darkest secret, but I can give some tips to make your friendships a little closer. 

Try making small plans at first. Simply asking someone to lunch at the dining hall or Lacava is an easy way to start seeing friends outside of a club and/or a class. Most people are happy to grab a quick lunch with you, and if it goes well, it’s a great way to make those friendships even closer. 

You can also make group plans if doing something one-on-one is too scary. Ask a bunch of people to come to your room to play games or watch a movie. Again, asking people to do something with you can be scary, but keep telling yourself that the worst they can say is no. If they say no, you can try to ask some other people. 

There are so many people at Bentley, and whatever type of friendship you are looking for, you can find it if you put yourself out there. It may seem scary at first, but getting over that anxiety and putting yourself out there is the only way to make new friends. 

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