Meet Jack Scurti—although it’s a rare occasion that you’ll hear someone actually referring to him as “Jack.” Scurti is a fun-loving, always energetic sophomore majoring in Accounting. Read to learn more about Scurti, and his transformation from cargo shorts.
HC: What’s the Jack Scurti starter pack?
JS: A v-neck, hair gel, purple Beats, and cargo shorts.
HC: What are some of your hobbies?
JS: Vaping.
HC: Biggest pet peeve?
JS: People who vape.
HC: If you won a million dollars, what would you do with it?
JS: Buy a kinda-pretty-awesome house.
HC: Best pickup line?
JS: I don’t need pickup lines.
HC: What was your favorite part of freshman year?
JS: Stripping for Lexi Squire.
HC: Favorite dance move?
JS: I don’t have one move—I just let the music take me.
HC: Current favorite song?
JS: Broccoli.
HC: If you could be any celeb women who would be?
JS: Jennifer Aniston.
HC: What do you miss from high school?
JS: It being socially acceptable to wear cargo shorts.
HC: If you could be any food, what would you be?
JS: A hot chili pepper.
HC: When did people start noticing your exceptional dance moves?
JS: When I nae-naed out that womb.
HC: What are classic Jack Scurti lines?
JS: “Come through…bring girls,” “it’s lit,” and “bro, YOLO.”
HC: What’s your one goal for sophomore year?
JS: Make Late Night Lit Again.
HC: What’s the diameter of your bicep?
JS: Swoll.
HC: If you dropped out of school, what would you do for work?
JS: Well, due to my aggressive dancing and previous experiences with stripping, I think it’s a no-brainer.
HC: Who is your favorite musical artist/group?
JS: Fifth Harmony. If you don’t like Fifth Harmony, then we can’t be friends.
HC: Who are some positive influences in your life?
JS: My phenomenal roommates. Unfortunately, I can’t exactly call them “positive influences.”
HC: Relationship status?
JS: Single…always.