College is full of work, student org fairs, and overpriced lattes, but what about the things they don’t put in the brochures? The unspoken rules that make the difference between just surviving college and actually thriving? Here’s your no-nonsense guide to the things no one tells you—but you absolutely need to know.
1. Professors Care—But Only If You Do
Yes, office hours exist for a reason. No, you don’t have to be failing to show up. Professors actually appreciate students who take the time to ask questions, clarify concepts, or just introduce themselves. It’s the easiest way to stand out in a sea of many, and those relationships? They can lead to recommendations, networking, and opportunities you wouldn’t have otherwise.
2. Instant Friend Groups Aren’t a Must
It’s totally okay and NORMAL if you don’t have a friend group by the end of your first month. Don’t force connections just because you feel like you should have a set friend group by mid-September. The best friendships can happen naturally— with the people you randomly sit next to in class, share a mutual hatred for group projects with, or meet through clubs
3. Participation Grades Are Basically Free Points—Use Them
If participation is part of your grade, don’t be the person who never speaks. I totally get it—shyness can make it super hard, but pushing yourself to contribute in the first few weeks makes it easier as the semester goes on. If you wait too long, you might feel the pressure to speak up just for the sake of your grade, which can be way more stressful. A simple comment, a question, or even just showing up consistently can boost your grade. Sometimes, it’s the difference between an A- and a B+.
4. Your Email Tone Matters
You’re in college now, which means emails should no longer start with “Hey” and end with “Thx.” A well-crafted, polite email can make all the difference when asking for extensions, clarifications, or opportunities. Bonus tip: Get to the point. Professors are busy—respect their time.
5. Clubs Are Great, But Don’t Overcommit
It’s tempting to sign up for every club at the activities fair, but be realistic. College is a balancing act, and it’s better to be deeply involved in one or two organizations than to stretch yourself thin across five. Pick what genuinely interests you, not what just looks good on a résumé.
6. Your GPA Matters… But Not As Much As You Think
Yes, keep your grades up. No, a single bad grade won’t ruin your future. Employers and grad schools look at the bigger picture—internships, experience, skills, and personal growth. Focus on learning, not just test scores.
7. You Will Romanticize the Struggle—And That’s Okay
At some point, you’ll find yourself walking home after a long night, sipping cheap coffee, listening to sad music, and thinking, “This is so cinematic.” and honestly? It kind of is. Embrace the chaos, laugh at the absurdity, and remember: These are the stories you’ll tell for years to come.
College is unpredictable, messy, and overwhelming—but that’s what makes it great. Learn the unspoken rules, find your people, and enjoy the ride.