Seasonal Slobbing

As soon as the summer season begins to rear its head we are bombarded with magazines which we pore over deciding which diet to begin in May in the quest to have the ultimate bikini body within eight weeks max. However this is usually done when you’ve just cracked open a packet of digestives and you can’t read what the cabbage soup diet or the maple syrup diet that Beyoncé lost 20lb with entails due to the large amount of crumbs obstructing the page. But yet we still continue on with the quest to be as skinny as Rosie Huntingdon-Whitely before we need to be anywhere near a body of water and a bikini; and on this quest we cut down our sugar in our cups of tea from two to one and solemnly swear that after a night out we will not get any fast food (however this tend to rarely happen.. well never happens) and pray that somehow our legs will grow 5 inches by the time July hits. 

However there is one saving grace from the seeing the new celebrity diet splashed across the front of every possible woman’s magazine, and that is the return of the autumn. The inevitable cycle of summer bikini body to winter jumper season starts as soon as memories of your girls holiday to Ibiza or travelling to far flung places have started to melt away and the reality of University work sets in. Once the leaves begin to yellow and the huge jumpers that were shoved to the back of the wardrobe are slowly but surely brought back out we are reminded that hidden underneath these we are protected from the bikini diet for at least another 6 months. 

When it comes to being a slob according to the Oxford dictionary the definition is to ‘behave in a lazy and slovenly manner’; however I think when it comes to seasonal slobbing, it is not so much behaving lazily but more having a long breather from the summertime pressure to squeeze into those tiny denim shorts and to just relax and layer up. Let’s be honest as soon as Aldi is putting up its Christmas range and the mince pies have hit the shelves (usually ridiculously early around mid-October) we have already retreated into our usual seasonal slobbing wear. And with this we are secretly glad that being able to curl up in front of the television with a large dominoes for one and wearing three jumpers is perfectly acceptable when there is no swimwear in sight. 

• bikini body
• diet
• winter