The Orgasm Gap is the phenomenon of statistics, recording the sexual satisfaction in people based on gender and sexual identity. This phenomenon is something that sexologist and sex therapist alike have found a very keen interest in researching and getting to the bottom of.Â
The Stats Â
Heterosexual women are reported to have the lowest orgasm rate at a measly 65% in comparison to their male counterparts who are scoring at a near perfect 95%. Even worse, the statistic for first time sexual encounters, reported to have rates of 55% for men and 4% for women.Â
Heterosexual women are not only losing the game to heterosexual men though, they are statistically proven to not be orgasming as much as heterosexual men, homosexual men and women. Furthermore, homosexual men are ranking at 89%, bisexual men coming in second at 88%, homosexual women at 86%, and bisexual women at 66%.Â
Even when including all these subgroups heterosexual women are orgasming the least while their sexual partners ranking highest which is outrageous considering heterosexual men are firing off with basically perfect accuracy.
This discrepancy in pleasure between genders participating in sex together is extremely interesting and shows how society views the pleasure of women, causing some professionals to have a particular interest in studying why this occurs and how to close this gap in gender pleasure.
So now the question arises….
What the hell are we going to do about this ladies? What are the solutions to the phenomenon?
Laurie Mintz wrote a book titled “Becoming Cliterature: Why orgasm Equality Matters and How to Get It”, and she claims the reasoning for this discrepancy in pleasure is because of what she calls “the cultural ignorance of the clitoris.” Read the first chapter in her book on the website linked for more in depth information.
The clitoris is often ignored in societal sex culture, for many women this is a key element missing from their sexual experiences that is making it hard for us all to “get off.”Â
There are varying misconceptions about what exactly the clitoris is. As explained, the clitoris is not just a small nub on the external vulva, but it connects to an internal network of nerves in the entirety of the female sex organs.Â
The external portion of the clitoris is small and pea shaped containing the clitoral glans, usually covered by a hood. When we look inside of the body, it has a large internal section shaped like a wishbone with the legs being referred to as the crura.Â
Pleasure sensations for a lot of women stems from stimulation of the clitoris. Don’t know where to find this little pleasure “nub?” Grab a mirror or talk to your partner about locating it. The clitoris contains about 8,000 different nerve endings in comparison to the vaginal canal. Meaning this little “nub” can really take sexual pleasure to the next level.
Tanya Koens, sex therapist, looks deeply into how we can fix the Orgasm Gap. One of the most interesting things that Koens points out, in my opinion, is that people with vaginas need about 20 to 40
minutes of stimulation before penetration can be performed comfortably. Using this philosophy, while engaging in coitus she believes women have a higher chance of having an orgasm if they were properly preheated before penetration is attempted.Â
Koens is looking to change the way people engage and converse about sex. By writing books where she talks about her own experiences closing her orgasm gap. By normalizing and discussing women’s pleasure.Â
In the end…
Women should be having more liberating sex lives, but they aren’t. Knowing these statistics and working against these kinds of stereotypes is one step closer to elevating your sex life. This change in how people see pleasure is revolutionary and can in turn boost sexual confidence and overall mood. Let’s all work together to close the orgasm gap. AND DON’T FORGET THE CLIT!