I’m going to start off by saying I am very, very happy with how BU’s campus looks this semester. Aside from wearing masks indoors and weekly testing, you wouldn’t know we’re still living on the edge of a pandemic. Classes are in person, club meetings are in person, and Comm. Ave is overflowing with students between classes — this is what we’ve been waiting for since March 2020.
Actually seeing people in person again is wonderful. I’m able to make friends in my classes, go out into the city on weekends, and just feel that general sense of life that regularly fills college campuses.
And yet, there’s this nagging feeling in the back of my mind that I’m not doing enough. After being sent home due to COVID my freshman year, I lost a year and a half of “normal” college life. Sophomore year was spent walking between my bedroom and the dining hall. It’s hard not to feel like I need to be playing catch-up.
It’s almost as if there’s this pressure on this year to make up for lost time. When I do homework in my dorm room, I feel like I should be spending time at a campus study space instead, surrounded by the people that weren’t here last year. If a weekend comes and goes and I barely left campus, I feel like I’m not seeing as much of the city as I should be.
But would I be feeling that way if COVID never happened? Probably not. If I’d never lost the option of being around other people, I wouldn’t feel like I needed to grab at it every chance I got. It’s certainly a positive thing when a life experience forces you to reevaluate what you take for granted, but I wasn’t expecting this piece of guilt to go along with it. It’s almost like FOMO for the little insignificant moments I didn’t have last year.
So am I doing enough? I might be. I’m so happy at school this year. Happy to be going out again, happy to be meeting new people, happy to be finding new experiences — even if I’m not filling 100% of my time surrounded by people. I’d like to think that that’s enough.
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