So far, Greek life is great. Granted, I’ve been in my sorority for a week and I won’t officially be initiated for another month, BUT the girls in my sorority are so nice, welcoming, and have made this transition so fun. It helps that one of my best friends is also a new member so we’re going through this whole thing together. But finding my way to a sorority was not easy. In fact, it was anything but easy.
Our motto at BU, and I’m guessing many other colleges, when it comes to sorority recruitment is “trust the process.” When you talk to girls who are in sororities they all say, yes, it was a tough weekend, but in the end, the process works.
That being said, that process is hard. You’re being judged on numbers and how you perform when talking to someone for only five minutes in some cases. Here’s a quick rundown of sorority recruitment at BU. During President’s Day weekend, sororities, Pi Chis (your advisors for this process who are all in sororities but won’t say which ones), and potential new members all flood the Boston Marriott Copley to find their forever sisters. This five-day process begins with visiting all 10 chapters the first day, up to eight the second day, up to five the third day, your top two on the fourth day, and the fifth day is Bid Day, the day that makes everything worth it as you find out which sorority you were invited to join.
Now, I wasn’t someone who was super invested in this when I began the process, but after day one I felt confident about the conversations I had had and I was excited for day two. Parties, or the events with each chapter, were to start at 10 AM on Saturday morning and if your parties started later, you would get a call telling you what time to show up. I wasn’t expecting a call and, even if I did get one I was anticipating being told to get there for 11 or 12… I was definitely not expecting to be told I didn’t have to show up until 6:15, considering parties ended around 8. Needless to say, I freaked out a lot and a good portion of my day was spent crying.
When I got there that night, the crying continued as I found out I had been dropped by seven of my top eight sororities and eight out of ten overall. It’s hard to stomach and, even though we’re constantly being told not to take it personally if a sorority drops us, or that it’s a reflection on them and not us, it’s hard to not feel like sh*t. You wonder what you did wrong or why you weren’t good enough and it hurts. But, that’s why your Pi Chis are there and thankfully one of mine was an angel (shoutout to Madi) and convinced me to go through with my two parties and not give up. I had about 30 seconds to calm down and make sure my makeup wasn’t a mess before I headed into the two sororities that had invited me back.
For the next two days, I went into the hotel, holding my breath and feeling like I was about to puke as I picked up my nametag and pulled out my schedule. I let out a huge sigh and a nervous, shaky smile each day as I was consistently invited back to the same two. While both were fabulous, I had made a connection with one of them. As the days went on, that connection blossomed and by preference night, the final night before bid day, I already felt like I was at home. It was an exciting but scary feeling as I had to face the possibility that I would not be offered a bid from this place I had grown to feel a part of over the preceding few days. It sounds crazy, but it really is possible to make a connection in a short period of time.
Bid Day came and I sat checking the clock incessantly as I waited for 7 PM when the ceremony was supposed to start. Once inside, they split us into our groups from day one (shoutout to group 10) and made us sit on our bid cards for what seemed like forever.
I sat there telling myself I would be happy either way, but I knew one would make me happier than the other. When the countdown from 5 was over, I tore open my bid card to see the black and gold seal of Kappa Alpha Theta and my heart jumped to my throat as I ran home to my new sisters. I found my best friend also amongst the bunch of screaming, hugging, and crying sisters as we joined in. It was a night filled with introductions, laughs, cake, fake tattoos, and memories I like to think will last a lifetime.
The process really does work… for some people. I’m not going to sit here and say if you trust the process you will find your home because the truth is, just like any other process in life, it’s not 100% perfect. People will have preconceived notions and ideas of where they want to end up because that’s human nature and you won’t always be what a sorority is looking for. The point is, the ones who invite you back see how amazing you are and what you have to bring to the table, so focus on that. What I will say is give it a try. It was an emotionally taxing and draining weekend full of tears and lacking in sleep, but I’m so thankful I went through the process. Greek life isn’t for everyone and I won’t tell you that my sorority is perfect because we’re not. But at the end of the day, we all love each other and I’m so happy to have found my home and I hope you will too.
Whether it’s through Greek life, another organization, or just with your friends, I’m confident you will all find your forever families.
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