A few weeks ago, I wrote an article for Her Campus entitled, “Who’s Got the Power”. The indecisive conclusion of the article left me unsettled – I did not feel as though the question had been answered. I couldn’t ignore the implications of my findings, especially the fact that while every girl, including myself, thought the Bucknell boys had the power, every boy I asked told me the opposite, that the girls have the power. It got me thinking – if boys think that we have all the power, why don’t we just act like it? I’ve heard too many girls asking each other, “What’s with the boys at this school? They are such jerks.” While you may think there’s nothing you can do but avoid them, I propose a different solution: a sex strike.
- Liberia, Africa, 2003: When Liberia’s second civil war broke out in 2000, the women realized that the men were the source of the violence. Though they engaged in much more than simple sex strike, the women of Liberia agreed that they would deny sex to their partners until the war ended. This aspect of their campaign for peace provided men with the extra push they needed to attend peace talks. The war ended shortly thereafter.
- Kenya, Africa, 2009: When women wanted to avoid the same violence that occurred after a 2007 election, they agreed to go on a sex strike. This organized strike also asked two of Kenya’s leaders’ wives to participate, urging their husbands to help the country during intimate moments, but firmly abstaining from sex.
- Philippines, 2011: A violent village in the Philippines was made peaceful by its women, who agreed to refuse to have sex with their husbands if the fighting continued. The strike was a success and prevented men from starting trouble.
- Lome, Togo, Africa, 2012: After about 120 opposition supporters of the current Togolese president were arrested, demonstrators were invited to participate in a one-week sex strike against all men.
- Madrid, Spain, 2012: People in Spain strike often, but never engaged in a sex strike until March of 2012. Spain’s high-class escorts went on strike toward a specific group: the nation’s bankers. They said they would continue the strike until bankers begin to offer bigger loans for those struggling.
Can we take some advice from these women? While the issues they are fighting for are much more complex than the one we are examining, their example shows how simple it can be to take back the power. In simpler words, if we stop hooking up with boys that don’t treat us well, we’ll be able to focus on finding boys who will. By raising our behavioral expectations, we can experience a new reality. A wise woman once said, “You have got to stop calling each other sluts and whores. It just makes it okay for guys to call you sluts and whores.” As women, we verify boys’ behavior by tolerating and in many cases, rewarding them for it. Perhaps we should take the advice of Ms. Norbury, and stop encouraging the type of behavior that we see so often on our campus.