The Wedding Date

This past week, Jack Wiles wrote an article for the Bucknellian about how girls have multiple personality disorder and, unfortunately, guys do not. Why are we the fortunate ones? Jack thinks these multiple personalities allow us to be studious, party goers – at the ready for whatever comes our way, whether we’re working hard or playing hard. Boys, on the other hand, may not be as readily able to transition neatly between these roles. I agree with Jack about the girls side of things; we may not always perfect these roles (i.e. still being drunk in your class on Thursday morning) but we know enough of what’s expected of us to put on a good show. So let’s assume Jacks right and boys only have one personality to work with. In the very early stages of a crush, when all of your secretly shallow interests are checked off, how do you decipher whether the guy at the mixer will be just as awesome in every other situation?
Imagine asking them to be your date to your best friend’s wedding because 1) that wedding, whenever it happens, is going to be amazing and, 2) because that actor was in both My Best Friend’s Wedding and The Wedding Date with Debra Messing, so it just works out, 3) because this one hypothetical situation can tell you a lot about this potential new boy. So you are at the reception after doing all of your bridesmaid duties (you’re in the bridal party, right?) and managing to cry only an appropriate amount while watching your best friend tie the knot. Of course there will be a ton of her family members there. Would your date know to approach her great uncle Ed differently than his frat brother? Will he consistently begin his sentences with “Dudeeee…” or cockily find a way to make the conversation about him? Or worse! Will he mumble and appear to be looking over the person’s shoulder the entire time? Yikes that would suck. No, your date would totally charm the relatives while listening to their stories, making eye contact and easily avoiding all cursing and derogatory terms. He doesn’t have to blow them away; he simply has to show them, and you, that he’s respectful.
Weddings are interesting scenarios because while you’re surrounded by older friends and family members, you also might be attending a rager. You may want to ask how your date would deal with an open bar. Although important, this question may not be the best decision-making criteria. Open bars can get the best of anyone, at any stage of the game. Somewhat like a generational equalizer. Rather ask yourself, would your date want to dance? This is extremely important! No one wants to have to deal with the wet mop that’s the only one still seated at your table. No way. You want someone who is willing to embarrass themselves while keeping up with you during the silly wedding/sweet sixteen/bat mitzvah songs (now everybody clap your hands…). Of course, they don’t have to be a phenomenal dancer like Vince Vaughn, they simply have to be willing to get out there and dance with you. If they sulkily, or drunkenly, would rather sit to the side, is this really the guy you want to go for? Your wedding date and potential crush should know how to hold a conversation with your best friend’s grandma and be prepared to have a good time. If you can find both elements of fun and respect in one guy’s personality, I’d say go for it.