When I was a sophomore in high school, my grandma passed away. She was such a huge light in my life, and I felt so alone without her. In order to cope with this loneliness, I decided to resort to hobbies and activities that I used to enjoy earlier in my childhood; one of those was watching Disney Channel. I grew up in the era of Hannah Montana, Wizards of Waverly Place, That’s So Raven, etc., and by the time that shows like Liv and Maddie or Austin and Ally came around, I was no longer interested. However, this changed when I returned back to watching the channel regularly.
I started noticing that there was one person that seemed to be all over every show, commercial break, and upcoming movie: Ross Lynch. This was 2013, and Teen Beach Movie had JUST premiered. He was everywhere. I did not even necessarily think he was that attractive or talented, but I knew that there was something. Little did I know what was going to happen in the following years.
After becoming a die-hard stan of the band he was in, R5, I quickly became enthralled with concert culture. I was doing anything and everything I could to go to as many of their shows as possible. Because they did not have that many fans, it was not as hard as I anticipated that it would be. On January 1st, 2016, I met Ross for the first time. I had him write handwritten lyrics to my favorite R5 song for me, and a few months later I got them tattooed.
I made so many friends during this time. I had a Twitter account dedicated to the fandom, and I found so many lifelong friends through that platform. For example, my friend Sara lives in Boston, and I have flown out to visit her multiple times, and she has done the same for me. My friend Montana wrote me a letter of recommendation for a scholarship in high school, which was read out at my awards ceremony. My friend Dani and I have also taken many trips together just to hang out for the day. One of the friends that I never anticipated making however, was Ross himself.
It was October of 2018 when the tides turned. We happened to be at the same place at the same time, and were able to have an actual conversation together. I have not told many people about this particular event, but it will always be something I will remember forever. From there, the more shows I went to, the more likely he was to go out of his way to interact with me. It felt so good to be acknowledged by him after supporting him for so long.
That all brings me to where I am now. He is someone that I cherish so dearly. We have trauma bonded, laughed, and most importantly we have shared gratitude for each other throughout the years. It is so strange to see him all over my TikTok for you page and see comments from people I know outside of the fandom. He has so many adoring fans now, but I can’t help but feel a sense of seniority knowing that I was there 10 years before the rest of the world was.
I do not believe in gatekeeping; however, I will say sometimes I wish I could go back in time to where our moments were more accessible. I have told him many times about how much light he brings into the world, and it is bittersweet to see the rest of the world be aware of that too.
