Confidence and I have a love-hate thing going on. Sometimes we get along great, but most times we don’t. However, almost all of the time I am crippled by his evil alter ego: doubt. I’m never quite sure if what I’m doing is…dare I say it….”good enough.” According to doubt, nothing I do ever seems to fulfill any acceptable standard. From schoolwork and social situations to my art, I am always a few notches down from where I should be. Why is doubt always where confidence should be?
Let me tell you one thing; self-doubt is not something I choose to feel. I’ve felt this way the minute I popped out of my darling mama. And let me tell you another thing, doubt goes deep.
Feeling insufficient is one thing, but allowing that negativity to control what you do in life is deadly. You never get anywhere. Your potential to do whatever it is you want to do is locked up. And why is that? It’s because you’re scared of sharing your potential with the world. And why are you scared? You could be rejected again. Or, you could be humiliated.
But what about the feeling of regret afterwards? In all cases, I’m with you my friend. Nothing hurts worse than feeling useless after putting yourself out there. More often than not, it’s easier to pack up your things, follow someone else’s command and just nod. This is something most of us are all too guilty of; don’t feel ashamed to admit it. It’s completely natural, but unfortunately we let our doubt control too many of our actions.
In my case, intimidation is what keeps me from pursuing my passions. There is so much talent bursting at the thinnest of seams throughout the world — incredible artists, makers, travelers, chefs, you name it. I am intimidated by every single one of them. If I create something, it’s never quite as good as someone else’s work. I feel only one feeling afterwards: defeat. Still, I brush that feeling off my shoulders and continue on my way as if nothing happened at all.
I’ve learned that comparing ourselves to others is superficial. We’re on this planet for only so long, so it’s pointless to build yourself in the exact footsteps of another. Live your life and never feel guilty for doing what you love. We are all immensely talented, so run full force with what you have.
When you block off the single most important catalyst in your life, you never produce anything of substance. The catalyst is what enables you to be the best version of yourself. It sets you free into the beautiful world of opportunity. If you keep your potential bottled up because you’re scared of what others will think, you work against your own creative genius. Whatever it is that helps you do your best, use it. If it’s confidence, own it. If it’s creativity, steer it. If it’s socialization, work it. Every one of us possesses a quality that sets us free from the gridlock of self-doubt. The fun part is treating that doubt like a bad breakup: forget about it and move on.
If you feel insecure about anything in your life, please remember to…
Keep doing you.