Imagine this: a balloon filling up with air. Expanding, expanding, expanding, to the point where it looks like it’s going to explode. Just increasing. Tension rises. Anxiety increases. But, it never explodes. That’s how my migraines start. My kryptonite.Â
I’ve been a chronic migraine sufferer since my freshman year of high school. Since then, I have had a few really bad episodes that have lasted longer than a week. I also get pretty frequent headaches, at least one a week, that feels so awful, but I’ve learned to just deal with it. It’s honestly the most awful thing that I have ever felt.Â
I got my first migraine during the fall of my freshman year. Lots of things were new and changing. I mean, I was new and changing too. I had really never felt anything like this before. Headaches were really uncommon for me, and typically, I was a fairly healthy and active person. I remember how horrible I felt. I didn’t know what this feeling was. As a semi-hypochondriac, I was convinced that I had a brain tumor or something horribly wrong with me. I went to the E.R, where they examined me and concluded that I just had a migraine. The most awful sentence ever. “Just” so easily diminishes the excruciating amount of pain that I was in. I was referred to a neurologist, who basically told me to load up on some nasty flavored vitamins, and see if that helped. News flash.. it didn’t!Â
One of the most frustrating things about being a woman is how easily your pain can be diminished, justified, or glanced over. It’s always a “hormonal” thing, a “period” thing, or a “pregnancy” thing. Don’t get me wrong, it definitely can be. But if I know for a fact that I’m not PMS-ing, and I’m not pregnant, then stop asking me if I am.Â
My next really bad migraine experience happened during the summer between my freshman and sophomore year of college, in 2022. This one was definitely the most painful to date. I was curled up in my room for days. No lights, no phone. Throwing up, ice packs, ibuprofen.. nothing was helping me. Days passed, and I was not feeling any better. I was like a zombie. I ended up going to urgent care, where they gave me two shots in my butt (awkward!), and made me drink water so that I could take a pregnancy test. Surprise! I was not pregnant. I went home, and hoped I would be on the mend soon.Â
I indeed was not on the mend soon. I then ended up going to the E.R where they gave me some more medicine, an IV, and let me wait it out until my pain diminished. It was at this point that I realized I definitely needed something stronger than just OTC pain meds to help my headaches go away. My mom has sat next to me and held my hand as I cried in pain during each of these bad episodes that I’ve had. This episode ended up being about two weeks long of an on and off migraine. After this, I was able to go see my doctor, and we discussed a plan for how I should be managing my health. I got meds prescribed to help me with pain whenever migraines were coming on.Â
Some people have auras that give them a sign when a migraine is coming. They see things or feel things and know what the trigger is. I never had that, and I never realized when/how/what made my migraines so strong. But, I finally figured it out after a couple of pretty gnarly headaches this semester so far. For me, my migraines always come around during the changing of seasons. It’s so weird, I know, but it just seems like every time a season is coming, my head hurts more and more.Â
While dealing with something like this can be incredibly difficult and discouraging, it’s something that I have learned to manage with things such as headache caps, medicine, relaxing, and catching early. If you’re a fellow migraine sufferer, I see you, and I hope you have some days that aren’t horrible. This journey has taught me a lot, but I am still learning as I go. I just want people to know that you don’t have to live in your pain, whatever pain it is, you can seek help and get some relief. Fight through the annoying doctors and comments from people, and advocate for yourself and your health!