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First Times: overrated or truly transformative?

The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Casper Libero chapter.

Bring to mind the image of a child fascinated by doing something for the first time. It’s amazing how the discovery is contagious in our eyes. First times are considered canonical events in our lives and when I stop to reflect on them, I come across the fact that until today, everything we are used to doing has already been done by us for the first time in the past. Of course, objectively, when we think about first times the usual thing that comes into our minds is sex. This could be a transformative and memorable episode for all of us – in a good way or not – but also the great idealization that is acquired in the sexual sphere, especially when we are very young.

However, there are extremely relevant first times over the years that we may never realize. Our first day of school, the first tooth that fell out, when we ate what is now our favorite food, our first fall from a bicycle, and when we could pedal alone, without help. When we fell in love for the first time, when we had our heart broken, – transformative even – our first fight, our first time at our favorite band’s concert, our first menstruation, our first time getting drunk, our first kiss, and so many others.

Are we adventurous enough to do more radical things for the first and perhaps only time? Could it be that as time passes, we are left to be carried away by what we already consider ourselves experienced? In other words, have we become comfortable people in life? Maybe the feeling of adventure, curiosity, and adrenaline are exclusively young thoughts? I like to believe not.

The fact is that we are induced to get used to a specific routine, where everything that happens to us is repeated every day. However, curiosity can be also installed within us, because people are different from each other, and when we go through youth and experience what we are programmed to experience, we exercise the right to choose to get used to the experiences of life or not. We can look for new things every day.

First times may be so definitive, both for good and for bad, that people may stop experiencing them because of the way they were initially approached. I know several people who became extremely afraid of driving after their first and only attempt, for example. Despite the impact caused, are we capable of not paying too much attention to the first attempts? Treating them as overvalued, that is, not acquiring such an important value for them? Of course, it’s difficult, mainly because we belong to a generation that values ​​focusing on specific things and overvaluing those who become very good at something as if they were born with the knowledge of it. 

Visibly, first times are transformative. We can say that perhaps not all of them have the same impact on our relationships in society. But yes, they all influence and transform us in a certain way, especially because our experiences are responsible for the version we are today, in the present moment. What we cannot do is stress about these situations, but rather face them lightly. Because everything in life has a first time, you choose whether it will happen again or not.

Therefore, I believe that curiosity in trying new things is part of who we are as a species. It’s part of our journey and we even end up developing neuropsychic reactions when we learn something new that changes us as human beings. It’s literally just life. It’s everyone’s first time figuring it all out, so don’t worry if it doesn’t work out, doesn’t adapt, doesn’t work. Life is a series of attempts in search not of our best version but of our happiness. 

Stepping out of your comfort zone and stopping doing something because of what others are expecting you to do, but rather because of what you want and for your living, can be truly transformative. So, last but not least, here is a list of things that may have never been done by you, in case you want to try something new – because there is a first time for everything!

  1. Donate old clothes;
  2. Go to the cinema alone;
  3. Learn to play chess;
  4. Take a trail;
  5. Take a new bike route;
  6. Do volunteer work;
  7. Eat traditional food from another country;
  8. Learn to do yoga;
  9. Visit a museum in your city;
  10. Go to a music festival;
  11. Try extreme sports; something that involves heights and adrenaline;
  12. Take a gastronomy course;
  13. Travel alone;
  14. Swim without clothes;
  15. Learn a new language.

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The article above was edited by Clarissa Palácio.

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FCL journalism student in SĂŁo Paulo, Brazil. Fascinated about writing and any form of artistic expression of thought.