Among all the recipes and stories that our grandparents can share with us, the things we really keep are pieces of advice. I guess it’s easy for us to forget that those people were once young, like us, and had their own lives to figure out. In other words, the people our grandparents turned themselves into are the same that, for once, also didn’t know who they were. When we receive their advice, it’s a part of their lives they can mirror themselves in a situation they had to figure out by themselves, and now have the opportunity to share what they have learned.
But who are those people? And what do they have to say?
BEING STRONG
Oswaldo was an active person, he liked to be in contact with nature and to explore it by himself. Looking the other way, he is also remembered as having a short temper and being a loving person. He was stressed and was always buying fights in his work, but that didn’t mean that he was like that at home, quite contrary. In summary, he was a loving husband and a present father who never had a hard time saying “I love you”.
Sofia, his granddaughter, would see Oswaldo as an encouraging person, always telling her to be strong. She also said that he constantly asked her:
“Where are these muscles?”
Oswaldo, Sofia’s grandfather
But he wasn’t only talking about her literal strength. In his cranky way, he was making sure that his grandkid was able to fight emotionally and to be strong.
LISTENING
“I guess my relationship with my grandparents it’s different from usual.”
Vitor
That was Vitor‘s answer to what his grandparents taught him. Then, he explained that their relationship wasn’t hierarchical. His grandparents never put themselves in a position of “knowing more”, they simply knew different things and always encouraged him to manifest his opinions. This relationship was based on an exchange of knowledge and points of views, in which everyone could talk and listen.
“I don’t know if any of them gave me life-changing advice, but it was always enlightening talking to them.”
Vitor
It’s fair to say that the biggest impact in Vitor’s life was learning that everyone has a different view on the matter and, regardless of age, sex, color or class, they all have their relevance.
PERSONAL VALUE
Clarissa’s grandfather, Almir, is the stereotype of what a grandparent is supposed to be. He’s a wise man who always has something to add. He dreamed about becoming a journalist, but it was his granddaughter who was capable of doing so. Nevertheless, he isn’t always able to talk about his love, but always capable of showing it.
Clarissa shared about when she felt lost in her own life and how her grandfather helped her to get through it.
“Every human being is a universe, but you can’t hold it in your hands“
Almir, Clarissa’s grandad
That was the counseling Almir gave to his granddaughter at that time, meaning you are your own person, to remember your value and understand that you can’t have control of it all. Life is unpredictable, and you can only manage it until a certain point.
MARRIAGE
“To marry, the only thing that matters is goodwill and strength to make it work.”
Giovanna’s grandmom
Giovanna received that advice from her grandma when she was first told she was going to be married. Furthermore, she told her grandparents had to build their lives alone, without even being able to buy a bed, but still managed to raise a loving family whom they are proud to be part of.
That is the biggest guidance to this new chapter of Giovanna’s life, the advice given from a couple who has more than double her age, only counting years of marriage. A couple who had taught her that love isn’t a feeling, it’s something that you build, that requires hard work and determination.
In conclusion, the support we receive from these people help us to shape ourselves and our way of looking at life. In other words, the type of people whom we let ourselves be guided lead us to what we will become. The impact left by our grandparents in our families is proportional to how much we will listen to what they have to say.
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The article above was edited by Clarissa Palácio.
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