Dating in college is honestly not what the movies make it seem like. It is many people from many different places who all have different views of society. With that comes a great discrepancy in the dating norms of what is accepted and what is not. Some people may be looking for serious relationships, while others are just exploring their options or focusing on personal growth. Navigating this complex social landscape can be challenging, but it’s also an opportunity to learn more about yourself and what you truly want in a partner. In this article, I’ll be giving you tips and tricks to survive the battlefield of college dating.
DON’T THINK ANYONE IS ONLY TALKING TO YOU.
That boy you like so much? Yes, girl, he’s probably talking to someone else. In college, it often feels like everyone is searching for love, and in the process, people may not always be honest about their intentions. It is easy to get caught up in the excitement of new connections, but the sad reality is that some people will say whatever it takes to keep your attention, even if it means hiding the truth. College dating can be a whirlwind of mixed signals and unspoken expectations which leads me to my next tip.
DO MAKE SURE TO COMMUNICATE AND SET CLEAR BOUNDARIES.
When getting to know someone, it is crucial to communicate your feelings openly and honestly. In college, many people will prioritize their own desires and may try to disregard your emotions in the process. It is easy to fall into the trap of compromising too much just to keep someone to keep someone around, but it is important to stand firm in your beliefs and boundaries. Never allow someone to pressure you into accepting terms and conditions that make you uncomfortable. Your feelings are valid, and to have a healthy relationship should always involve mutual respect and understanding.
DON’T CRASH OUT.
When that person that you like a lot doesn’t align with your wants and needs, it is very important to handle the situation with maturity and grace. No matter how disappointed or frustrated you might feel, avoid making a scene. A college campus is a small, intersected community which means almost everyone knows everyone, and word travels fast. Acting impulsively can lead to unnecessary drama and may affect your reputation in ways you did not anticipate. Instead, take a step back, process your feelings in private, and move forward with dignity.
DO KEEP YOUR OPTIONS OPEN.
Get to know more than one person at a time and keep your options open. It does not have to be anything too serious, but spreading your attention across multiple connections can help you avoid becoming too invested in one person too quickly. Devoting all of your time to a single individual can lead to disappointment, especially in a college environment where most people are exploring different relationships simultaneously. As mentioned before, college is a time of meeting new people and forming multiple connections, so don’t feel obligated to limit yourself to just one person. Keeping things casual and open help you better understand what you truly want in a relationship.
DON’T HAVE SEX UNLESS YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE AND SAFE.
Your health is incredibly important, and no one should ever jeopardize it. In a college environment where almost everyone knows everyone, it is very crucial to be mindful of this when it comes to your well-being. Whether it is physical, emotional, or mental health, protecting yourself should always be a top priority. Not everyone shares the same hygiene practices, values, or morals as you, which makes it even more important to set boundaries and make informed decisions. Take the necessary precautions, trust your instincts, and never compromise your health for the same of fitting in or pleasing someone else.
DO LET PEOPLE DO NICE THINGS FOR YOU.
With all advice given, you should still have fun while dating. Don’t get so caught up in the complexities of dating in college that you forget to embrace the joy and excitement that comes with meeting new people. When someone wants to do something nice for you, allow them to— because you deserve to be treated well and experience special memories. Accept the flowers, go on the dates, and enjoy the little things without overthinking. College is a time to create meaningful experiences, so let yourself have fun while staying true to your values and boundaries.