I’m just going to be flat out and say that last semester was terrible. It was honestly the worst period of my life, and that’s true tea, sis. I cried at least four times a week, I was extremely overwhelmed, and felt ugly, unwanted, and lonely. It seemed like there was no one who I could confide in, so I kept my feelings bottled up, and it was D-R-A-I-N-I-N-G!
I refuse to repeat that cycle this semester. So, below, I’ve put together my aspirations for the 2019 spring semester that I hope will inspire and help at least one person.
- Attend at least one on-campus event a week
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There’s always something poppin’ in the AUC. Between the various plays, open mics, panels, dance classes, and organization ran events, I have a world of knowledge and entertainment literally only feet away. All of the events that I’ve attended previously have been enjoyable, so it’s not like they’re not worthwhile. I’m very much a homebody, but this semester I’m forcing myself to be more social, and this is part of the plan to accomplish that.
- Go to one party a month
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I’ve come to terms that I’m not a party person, like at all. They’re hot, packed, and I’m convinced that people just come to stand, look cute, and get stared at. On top of all that, parties make me so self-conscious. I know this may sound weird, but I always feel like everyone is staring and judging me. Of course, this is all in my head, but I can’t help but feel so out of place. However, part of the college experience is partying, and I’m not getting to live that. It helps that two of the best parties, Toga and J’ouvert, are this semester, so that’s already two off the list!
- Look decent for class
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At the beginning of last semester, I dressed like I didn’t love myself, I did little to no makeup, and I didn’t do much to my hair. I came to the realization towards the end of October that your image is everything. Think about, before a person speaks to you the only way that they can form an impression of you is how you present yourself. If I look put together and confident, chances are people will think of me as such even if I’m having the worst day imaginable. Also, how you present yourself to you professors is major, so I have to take that into account as well. Now, by no means am I saying that not wearing makeup and dressing down means that you’re less than. For me personally, I know I’m not myself when I do these things. If you want to rock a messy bun and pjs to class, by all means, queen, do you!
- Be active in class
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I’ve always been the type to go to class, get my work done, and leave. I don’t talk much because classrooms are the perfect environment for my anxiety to shoot through the roof. Although my grades have never been a problem, answering, or even asking a few questions here and there won’t hurt me. I’ve learned that class is where you make a lot of your good friends, especially if it’s a challenging subject. Your classmates understand your struggle. You go from asking for help on the homework, to hanging out every now and again. And to add to that, be engaging leads builds a rapport with your professor that comes in handy when you need something like a letter of recommendation *wink wink*.
- Take my mental health seriously
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Like I mentioned earlier, last semester was horrible, mentally, emotionally, and physically. If you’re unaware, hi, I’m Black. A lot of Black families don’t take mental health seriously, or think of it as taboo. I believe that it’s just as important as physical health; you can’t have one without the other. So, this semester, I’m getting my s*** together, and getting into somebody’s counseling sessions. My amazing roommate and sister graciously sent me a list of African-American women therapists in the Atlanta area. Here’s the link for anyone interested!