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Soulmates: A Love Story That Transcends Labels

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at CAU chapter.

Soulmates—when most people hear the word, they immediately think of romance, picturing destined lovers brought together by fate. However, the true definition of a soulmate goes beyond just romantic partnerships. A soulmate is simply someone ideally suited to another, whether as a close friend or a life partner. These deep, meaningful connections can exist in both platonic and romantic form, shaping our lives in profound ways. Understanding the many faces of soulmates allows us to appreciate the different kinds of love and companionship that enhance our journeys. 

the History of soulmates

The concept of soulmates has been a topic of discussion since the time of the ancient philosopher Plato. In his famous work Symposium, Plato suggested that humans were once whole beings who were split in two, leaving them to spend their lives searching for their missing half. This idea laid the foundation for the modern understanding of soulmates. The term itself, however, first appeared in Samuel Taylor Coleridge’s 1822 poem, reinforcing Plato’s notion of destined connections. Over time, the concept has sparked debate, with some viewing it through a spiritual lens, while others question whether soulmates are a scientific phenomenon rooted in psychology and compatibility. While the spiritual perspective sees soulmates as predestined, possibly linked across lifetimes, the scientific view explains them through attachment theory, social conditioning, and brain chemistry, suggesting that our strongest bonds are formed through experience rather than fate.

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Platonic soulmates

A platonic soulmate is someone that you believe is meant to be your friend. The actual definition of a platonic soulmate is a deep, non-romantic connection that feels destined. In friendships like this, you share a deep understanding of your friend and their emotions. When one thing hurts them, it is liable to hurt you the same. As friends, you will watch one another grow and evolve without judgment. No matter where you are or what you are going through in life, they will be there. For example, Dess Dior and Jayda Wayda are prominent best friends in pop culture. They show mutual support for one another and allow the other to grow with no judgment. These types of friendships are very important to the growth you have as an individual. Having someone who understands you on such a deep level can provide emotional security and a strong sense of belonging. Platonic soulmates remind us that love and connection exist beyond romance, offering companionship that can last a lifetime.

Romantic Soulmates

Just like platonic soulmates, romantic soulmates is the same concept. The definition of a romantic soulmate is a deep, romantic connection that feels like fate and is uniquely fulfilling. These connections are different from typical relationships, due to the strong connection. With someone you believe is your romantic soulmate, you will share an emotional connection that can not be duplicated. This person will also challenge you in ways that no one has before. Romantic soulmates urge to grow and correct any flaws that you do not like within yourself. Another prominent characteristic of this connection is how comfortable you feel with the person. You will be able to let your guard down with them and grow into the person you aspire to be. For example, Angela Bassett and Courtney B. Vance are very successful couple in the industry and they have been together for 28 years. Your romantic soulmate will also come at the right time in your life, they will align with every goal that you have.

Can platonic soulmates become romantic?

The answer to that question is yes. However, there is a big difference between intense friendship and romantic attraction. Platonic soulmates  require different needs than romantic soulmates, because when you have a different perspective of your friends and the person you’re in the relationship with. Platonic soulmates require trust, emotional support, and open communication to maintain a deep and lasting connection. They provide unwavering companionship, respect boundaries, and encourage personal growth while offering a judgment-free space for vulnerability and allowing you to  be yourself. While platonic soulmates require a profound bond, it is not romantic. Romantic soulmates also require the foundation of trust, open communication, and mutual respect to build a deep connection. The big difference is the romantic connection and physical intimacy that you share with your romantic soulmate. Like stated before a platonic soulmate can become a romantic soulmate, but the biggest indicator would be if you mutually share that romantic connection. Platonic soulmates are individuals that you share a significant non-romantic bond, that you share a deep emotional connection without any sexual elements. In contrast, romantic soulmates are partners with same deep emotional connection with physical affection and sexual intimacy. 

The Myth of “One true soulmate”

A well-known misconception about soulmates is that you only have one, but this is simply untrue. As a human being, you experience different phases of life, and with each phase, new people enter and exit your journey—including both platonic and romantic soulmates. When you evolve as a person, your interests, hobbies, morals, and overall perspective on life can shift into something totally different. This affects the relationships in your life because you can outgrow them or simply grow in different directions. Most people you encounter serve a purpose, whether it’s to teach you a lesson, provide support, or shape your understanding of yourself and the world. Some soulmates may stay with you for a lifetime, while others may only be present for a short but meaningful period. Regardless of their duration in your life, each soulmate leaves a lasting impact that helps you grow into the person you are meant to be. Understanding this can help you embrace the natural flow of relationships and appreciate the role each connection plays in your personal journey.

How to recognize and nurture soulmate connection

Recognizing a soulmate connection often involves an immediate sense of comfort and familiarity, as if you’ve known the person for a lifetime. However, sustaining this deep bond requires intentional effort and conscious choices from both individuals. It’s important to acknowledge that not all relationships, even those perceived as soulmate connections, remain healthy over time. As you evolve, your interests and perspectives may change, potentially leading to outgrowing certain relationships. Letting go of connections that have become toxic or one-sided is crucial for personal well-being and growth, allowing space for more meaningful and fulfilling relationships to develop.

The beauty of soulmates

Both platonic and romantic soulmates help cultivate our live in unique and profound ways, shaping our futures for the better. Platonic soulmates offer unwavering support and understanding, allowing us to true authentic selves without fear of judgement. This deep connection fosters personal growth and emotional resilience, as we navigate life’s challenges together. Romantic soulmates, on the other hand, provide a partnership that combines emotional intimacy with shared goals and dreams, while building that foundation for mutual development and allowing yourself to be fulfilled. The beauty of these relationships lies in the ability to complement each other; while romantic soulmates inspire us to pursue your passions, a platonic soulmate offers a safe space to reflect and recharge your energy. Together, these connection form a support system that encourages us to reach our full potential, enhancing our journey through life. 

My name is Kyla Adams. I am an undergraduate student at Clark Atlanta University, pursuing a B.A. in Sociology with a minor in Political Science. With a passion for advocacy, social justice, and community engagement, I’m committed to making a meaningful impact.