It’s finally October, which means the countdown to Halloween has begun. One of my favorite Halloween activities is going to haunted houses and hayrides on weekends to get into the fall spirit. There are even places where you fill out a poll before going into the haunted house about what you’re most scared of. This got me thinking: what if there was a haunted house solely made to frighten college students? Here’s what they should think about including:
1. A Neon Sign with Your Student Loan Debt Amount
Believe me, no one wants to be reminded of that.
2. Your Professor Telling You That You’ve Failed The Class
And it’s too late to apply for academic forgiveness, so here’s to never getting a job.
3. The Current Status of Your Bank Account
All those late-night fast food runs with your roommates added up fast.
4. The Clown from It
If we’re being honest here, I’d probably climb into the sewer drain if he said he would erase my student loan debt.
5. Your Phone Screen Shattered
That feeling when you drop your phone facedown and give a little prayer before you flip it over again, that’s true horror.
6. Finding out That Your Entire Grade Will Be Dependent on Group Projects
This means double the work with half the credit.
7. Adults Asking You What You Want to Do with Your Life
Considering we don’t even know what we want to eat for lunch that day, there’s a good chance we have no idea what we want to do with the rest of our lives.
8. Dining Hall Food
Enough said.
9. How Much Weight They’ve Gained from That Dining Hall Food
The Freshmen 15 is real and you can’t deny it.
10. Dorm Bathrooms
We now ask the question: does cleaning services really clean the bathroom everyday? We beg to differ.
11. The “New” Taylor Swift
“I’m sorry, the Old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now.”
12. Your Parents Posting Pictures from Your Middle School Years on Facebook
First, not only is it horrifying that your parents are active users on Facebook, but no one wants to be reminded of the brace-face years.
13. No Wi-fi
How can we post a picture of all the fears we just conquered though?
14. Telling Them They’re Assignment Was Due Five Minutes Ago to Canvas
Because we’ve all been out on a Friday night at midnight and realized we were supposed to turn in that essay at 11:59 p.m.