Four Tips on How Not to Fall on Your Butt This Winter (or to at Least Do it Gracefully)

Flip flop and Croc people- I’m talking to you! Save yourself a whole lot of flailing arms, racing hearts, and bruised booties this winter, and get yourself some real boots with closed toes and heavy treads. To do this, I highly recommend either stealing your dad’s Bean Boots or treating yourself to a nice pair of fake Uggs, or, as I like to call them: “Fuggs.” The variety of Fuggs out there has never been broader, but I personally recommend the brand Bear Paw. They’re warm, sturdy, and thanks to their knockoff nature, your wallet will be a little thicker and provide more cushion when you inevitably fall on your butt.

Speaking of butts, I also recommend finding yourself a knee-length puffy coat to help protect yours! Cropped coats are cute and all, but when you do make an unplanned trip to the pavement, it’s the knee-length coat that’ll be there to protect your tush from the ice and snow, not that cropped one. Plus, knee-length coats look beyond cute with a solid pair of leggings poking out from underneath and will keep you nice and toasty for all your wintertime adventures.

Here’s the thing about steps: when they’re nice and shiny that does not mean try me. Black ice is tricky and can leave you sprawled on the ground making an involuntary snow angel faster than anything else. Even if you think you can make it up a slick set of steps, don’t risk it! However, if you have absolutely no other options, bend slightly forward, make yourself as flat-footed as possible, and cling to those handrails with the same desperation as a Colgate student clinging to their sanity during finals week. If Adventure Dads can make it to the peak of Everest and back, you can make it to the top of the Persson steps!

I’m about to let you in on the best-kept secret of wintertime hikers everywhere: YakTrax. In my opinion, YakTrax are the best invention since Spotify Wrapped and maybe even the Byrne Dairy Cookiewich. Essentially, they are rubber, steel grips that can be stretched over any pair of flat-bottomed shoes to give them the same traction and stabilizing power as a pair of top-of-the-line snow cleats. The one downside to YakTrax is that the gripping coils on the bottom can scratch the floor if worn indoors (I learned this the hard way), but this is easily remedied by how easy they are to slip on and off. As an added bonus, YakTrax come in a variety of subtle colors like black and grey and are only truly visible when looking at the very bottom of your shoe, so you won’t have to worry about them stealing attention from your cute winter ‘fits. Say goodbye to snowy butts and adrenaline rushes and hello to YakTrax!