COVID-19 sucks. There is absolutely no way around it. The United States has just surpassed 50,000 deaths from the virus and its complications, with countless more infections and hospitalizations. The closure of millions of businesses across the country has also led to staggering unemployment numbers, making many Americans wonder how to pay their rent or feed their children. COVID-19 has had a horrific effect on the entire world, and its shock waves will be felt for years to come.
However, many mental health resources recommend taking breaks from the news, or even finding small moments of positivity to lift spirits. These sound like great suggestions, but some corners of the Internet challenge this advice. A graphic has been circulating Twitter depicting people playing music and dancing on their apartment balconies while less privileged individuals — sanitation workers, food delivery people, and EMTs — suffer down below. I agree wholeheartedly with this central argument: people’s quarantine experiences have not been the same, and we should acknowledge that. Having the time and space to dance and foster joy is a privilege not available to all. But I wonder: is using positivity to cope really insensitive or morally wrong?
I recognize that my own quarantine experience has been privileged; I live in a spacious home with kind family members, loving pets, and a (mostly) stable Internet connection. Even in this situation, my family is struggling. My mom and I worry every time we have to leave the house that we will unknowingly infect my 92-year-old grandmother. Additionally, in such an unstable economy, we fear for surprise expenses. Beyond my own family, I find myself occasionally unable to cope with the vast amount of pain and suffering that exist in the world. My heart breaks for millions of people across the globe who have it worse, and it’s paralyzing to realize just how little I can do to help them.
To bring myself out of the darkness, I try to find the light. A possible silver lining: quarantine has given me the time and space to explore potential career paths without worrying that the world will pass me by. As such, I have been able to develop a tentative plan for the next year of my life, one which accounts for an unstable job market. Sitting at home has had the unexpected positive effect of clarifying my interests and goals. For the first time in a while, I feel like I have a strong direction. I wish with every fiber of my being that COVID-19 did not exist, but in quarantine I have felt bursts of confidence and optimism as a result of my career plans, and with that, crushing guilt.
Oddly enough, one of the quotes I live by comes from an episode of Glee: “Shame is a wasted emotion.” Shame is entirely unproductive; it makes people feel awful about things for the sake of feeling awful. If finding silver linings helps you cope with tragedy, let go of feeling ashamed for that. Of course, bonding with family, taking up a new hobby, or even rerouting your life are all privileged activities, but there is no reason not to feel thankful for them; you can do positive things for yourself while recognizing the situations of others. Human beings can only process so much pain before they seek out positivity.
Instead of feeling guilty, channel your gratitude into improving someone else’s life. If you can, donate to your local food bank or an organization fighting the virus, send a care package to your best friend, or call a family member who lives alone. Thinking about the world’s collective suffering is overwhelming — and even crushing — so focus on areas where you can make a noticeable difference. Of course, it is vitally important to understand that the pandemic has exacerbated systemic inequalities within our society. The very workers deemed “essential” are those fighting for a liveable wage. However, it is entirely possible to advocate for less privileged populations while still finding joyful moments in your own quarantine. Whether you reconnect with a family member, find your favorite brand of bread in the grocery store, or finish your thesis, celebrate the small moments that make life in a pandemic even a little less horrible. And if you’re able, channel some of that positivity into aiding the fight against this disease.