A Graduating Senior Tells Us to Challenge Our Notion Of Success

 

By Leah Messing

 

During my last two years in high school, I worked tirelessly to support an organization called Challenge Success, conceived by researchers at the Stanford University School of Education. In response to the high levels of stress induced by the college admissions process, it aims to redefine success in a qualitative rather than quantitative manner to promote student engagement. Challenge Success encourages students and parents to include into their definitions of success concepts of resilience, integrity and interpersonal skills—rather than GPAs, trophies and awards.

 

Although my high school years are over and the college admissions process is long behind me (thank goodness), the battle over what success really means persists here in college. Now, as a senior, I feel that success is ultimately defined by the job offer one receives, and especially the ability to secure it by graduation. Upon accepting an offer, we rush to post our plans on Facebook for all to see. We receive 100-200+ likes and experience our fifteen minutes of social media fame. I worry that this process encourages us to take the first job offer we get even though it may not be the right fit.

 

Recently, I had a moment where I felt like a success (as I define it). One morning before an interview, I had what many would call a series of unfortunate events. I’m not going to bore you with the details, but they include a lost wallet, lip gloss exploding on my coat, and a late arrival. I think that most people, even the most capable, would be frazzled by all of the complications that arose, and flunk the interview. Despite all of the mishaps that happened that morning, I kept my composure and had my best interview ever. I am fairly confident this is because I continually praised myself for my resilience, which carries a lot of weight in my definition of success. The resilience I displayed that morning made me feel like more of a success than getting an offer from that company ever would.

 

I am still toying around with what success means to me. I do not want to impose my definition of success on those reading this. I recognize that everyone’s definition is different, and it should be. That being said, I hope that everyone’s definition is a little more qualitative and a little less quantitative.