The first time I went to a concert alone it wasn’t intentional. I was 17 years old at a music festival and I had lost all my friends in the crowd at a different show. So I spent the rest of the day going to concerts on my own. At first I was intimidated to walk into a crowd without anyone else coming with me. I quickly realized though that it wasn’t all that scary and it was just as fun.
Now, almost three years later, I don’t even think about it. If a band comes to town and none of my friends want to come with me to see the show, I don’t think twice about buying a ticket anyways. What always shocks me though, is how other people react when I tell them I’m at a concert on my own. I can’t count the number of times that I have been told it’s “so cool” that I do this or that I must be very confident. On one particular occasion, a guy approached me at a concert and, upon finding out I was there on my own, told me it was a “bold choice.”
Is it really though?
We have a tendency to stigmatize doing things alone, like going to a gallery or out for dinner. It’s not so much that we worry about how much fun we’ll have alone but instead the concern is over how others will judge us. However, a Washington Post article explained that people are likely to have just as much fun on their own.
“People decide to not do things all the time just because they’re alone. But the thing is, they would probably be happier going out and doing something,” Rebecca Ratner, a professor who has studied why people are hesitant to go out on their own, told the Washington Post in 2015.
In recent years, the topic of self-care has been given more of a spotlight. Self-care largely focuses on setting time aside to do activities alone, like reading a book or taking a bath. Lifehacker explains that setting time aside to do things we love can help reduce stress, refocus and perform better. Looking at lists of self-care activities though, they rarely include things we stigmatize doing alone. But why should they?
Going out alone can be just as rewarding and fun as going out with other people. It’s definitely a different experience but that doesn’t mean it’s a bad one. Whenever I go to concerts on my own, I have a good time. It’s not in spite of the fact I’m alone or because of it. It’s because I’m getting to enjoy something I love, with or without other people.