A period is a natural thing that happens to every woman every month, and there is more to it than simply the release of an egg and blood. However, there are many aspects of a woman’s period that are misunderstood or simply not discussed at all, and it is important for men to have a proper understanding of periods—not just what gets taught in a biology class. So, here are a few things that women wish men understood about periods:
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It affects our wardrobe choices
Women tend to have a specific section of their wardrobe reserved for period week, especially when it comes to bottoms. Leggings, tight pencil skirts, white pants and cute undies are the first to go. Also, if we could wear PJs all day, we would.
We don’t use it as an excuse, and neither should you
I can recall only one time in my whole life that I used my period as an excuse for something, and it was to skip swimming class (I was 14 at the time, and I honestly still support that decision). At age 20 though, it never even crosses my mind to use my period as an excuse to get out of something. It’s an inevitable part of women’s lives and we have to deal with it. I don’t think society expects anything less from us.Â
However, sometimes people think it’s appropriate to always blame a woman’s period if she is upset. To set the record straight, do not do that. In most cases it isn’t appropriate. If we go to work, to school, to the gym and basically live our lives without making excuses, do not use that against us either.Â
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We don’t feel cute
During our periods, women get bloated, break out and just feel gross in general. Feeling bloated often leads to feeling fat which can cause a significant decrease in self-confidence. Then mother nature sprinkles your face with pimples because that’s the one extra thing you really needed to make your day. And to top it all off, there is a crime scene in your pants so, even if you shower five times a day, you will still feel dirty.Â
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Sex is still an option, but doesn’t have to be
There is a lot of taboo around the idea of having sex during your period—mainly revolving around the fact that it’s gross, messy and generally should not take place. It is important to address the fact that many people do have period sex, and it doesn’t need to be messy. It just requires extra precautions to avoid a mess. Shower sex is a great compromise! However, just because period sex is a viable option in a couple’s sex life, the decision should be mutual.
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We can’t always control our emotions
Although any remarks that a woman is sensitive, rude, impatient, and generally more emotional while on her period are absolutely inappropriate, fact is, periods do cause women to go through emotional roller-coasters. Most women are extremely capable of keeping their cool when at school or the workplace, so comments about this in these environments are really distasteful. However, when we come home is usually when it is most obvious, because the emotions do need to come out. So, if you live with a sister, mother, a female friend or significant other, please be tolerant—no snide comments. I guarantee you, we don’t particularly enjoy this process either.
It is scientifically proven that we will get crazy cravings
According to U by Kotex, serotonin levels are usually lower during premenstrual syndrome, which causes the body to crave sugars and carbohydrates. I have tremendous respect for those meal-planning girls with little to no cheat days. I for one have zero self-control over food during my period. This isn’t always fun for girls—it cuts into our regular eating habits and our budgets (you wouldn’t believe how fast I can say yes to all-you-can eat sushi). While experiencing it, the desire is nearly uncontrollable because our bodies are craving these foods so badly.Â
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For some, it hurts like a B*tch
Cramps are not some kind of myth that only happen when you first get your period or when you’re pregnant; they are uterine contractions and they can happen often. Cramps can range anywhere from slight discomfort to extreme pain. In the more serious cases, cramps can interfere with women’s everyday lives. They can get in the way of job interviews, important presentations, exams and more. Also, bad cramps can disrupt a woman’s sleep schedule and even, on occasion, force her to leave school or work if the pain is too intense. Also, I beg of you, don’t tell a girl “that’s nothing compared to being kicked in the balls.” We’ve heard it before and the difference is that we have to deal with cramps every month.Â
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It doesn’t get better with time; we just get better at hiding it
As a woman goes through menstrual cycle after menstrual cycle and menstrual cycle, she may mention her discomfort less. It is important to understand that we are used to periods. We are used to the slightly narrower choice of wardrobe, the emotional roller coaster, the pain, the lowered self-esteem and the cravings. However, just because we are used to our periods doesn’t mean they get better, we’ve just gotten better at integrating them into our lives.Â
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Every woman experiences their period differently
The final thing that men need to understand about periods is that one woman’s experience can be vastly different from another’s. Everything from emotions to pain to flow to cravings, every woman is different. Some women experience all the symptoms, some experience none of them and some fall somewhere in between.Â