From time to time, I convince myself that I’m not truly good at anything. I’ve got tons of hobbies but have never been great at any of them. I crochet sweaters, but the sleeves are often too small. My ukulele is always out of tune and the stories I write seldom make sense. Since these are things I enjoy doing, it makes sense that I would want to be amazing at them. However, since I’m not perfect at them, they become activities that aren’t worth mentioning or pursuing any further. Unfortunately, this mindset caused me to find my hobbies boring and useless. I couldn’t see the point in creating if what I made wasn’t exceptional.
At this point, I had to figure out what was happening. After some time, I traced it back to this deep need to be perfect in every way, or as close to it as I could get. The idea of perfection had turned into my motivation rather than a byproduct of my passions. Everything that I had once loved doing like learning, writing, creating music, and taking on general creative endeavors turned into a competition that I could never win.
This idea that what we do has to be exceptional has ruined us. It causes us to quit before we get disappointed. It fosters guilt when we don’t reach the milestones “on time”. This mindset teaches us that we should bind our joy to results and progress. We take part in things to become perfect at them rather than finding enjoyment in improving at what we love. This approach takes the fun out of making something from nothing, and the pride that usually follows.
Eventually, I found that it doesn’t matter whether I’m exceptional at what I love doing. Hobbies aren’t always supposed to be some kind of measurement of talent and success. They’re ways to pass time and cope with existence. I can be passionate about something while just being “alright” at it. Being exceptional isn’t a requirement for something to be worth your time. Rather than letting progress drive me, I try to let enjoyment push me forward. I enjoy writing, so I continue to write and improve with each word I type.
No matter how goal-oriented you are, the focus of your activities should be to make yourself happy, not solely to be the best. Once you reach what you were looking for, it’ll be worth so much more if you enjoyed getting there.