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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at CU Boulder chapter.

I’ll admit I have a problem. I can’t help but compare myself to other people, everywhere, all the time -– even to the point where it becomes jealousy. I always think I’m missing out. A severe case of FOMO. I remember being obsessed with certain girls at many points in my life and thinking: “How does she not have acne? Why does she draw so well? Why do boys look her way? Why does she look good in these outfits? How can she manage to travel to all these places?”

I’ll run it back from the beginning. I sometimes miss the days when we were all kids; our only concern was existing. That was before we had responsibilities. If we needed help, our parents would do things for us. All we could do was play with toys or other people or even just relax. Well, if there was no homework or chores, of course.

In middle school, I remember a guest speaker came to our class. She warned us about how social media could be a toxic place, and how everything is fake and doesn’t reflect reality. Because the reality is, people only show the good parts of their lives. I remember thinking: “That’s so silly. I will never fall into this trap. None of this is real.”

In high school, my comparison problems started. At this age, people were balancing jobs, school, relationships, and more. This was also the age that I got into Instagram. Before I attended my new school, I made sure to follow as many people as I could, just to see what they would be up to. I was determined to be a new and improved version of myself. This was not my neighborhood school, anyway. I knew fewer than ten people from my middle school who would be attending my high school. 

This is when certain girls started catching my eye. I’d look them up on Instagram. I’d constantly see what was up with people. Clicking through stories, highlights, and posts, it seemed like all smiles. I would always get thoughts like: “Why does she get a lot of likes? Why does she get a lot of comments? Why are people always tagging her? Why does she get a lot of ‘happy birthday’ stories? Why does she understand this assignment but I don’t?”

Why, why, why?

It seemed like their life was perfect. Whenever I had a bad day, I would wonder if any of these people had a bad day. Especially at the end of senior year, after a fallout, I wondered why some friend groups never broke apart. Even if people went to different colleges across the country, they would always find their way back to each other at home. 

Even at college, I see many people take on a combination of majors, minors, and certificates. I rarely see anyone focus on a single major. I see people double major, or double minor, and still have time to see their friends. Meanwhile, with just one major and one minor, there are times when I feel like I am already drowning in schoolwork. How do people do it?

It got so bad that I had to limit myself on Instagram to only 30 minutes a day at one point because I was so busy comparing myself to other women. I was falling into the trap that the speaker from middle school warned me about. Something had to change. That’s why I had to shift gears and focus only on myself.

Here at school, I felt pressured to hang out with friends every day. I didn’t want people to think I was a loner, because I often roam campus alone. I would feel embarrassed if I was by myself and saw someone I knew walk by with someone else. But I learned that I should take things one day at a time. It’s ok to be alone. Schoolwork comes first, that is why I am here in the first place, to earn a bachelor’s degree. So, I balance things out. People at this school aren’t going anywhere!

I love the New Year so much. It’s a chance to start over. All the things I did not accomplish in 2024, I will make sure to do so in 2025. For instance, I make it a goal to reach out to other people, whether it be through classes or clubs. But my biggest New Year’s resolution is to stop comparing myself to others. I don’t know what’s going on in people’s lives behind the scenes, I only judge based on what I see.

I need to be confident in myself. Self-worth is very important. I need to look back on my accomplishments, the places I have been to, the friends I have made, and the adventures I have been on. I think everyone has a unique style, which tells who they are as a person. For me at least, I am proud to have a lot of purple clothes. I don’t wear this color every single day, but it brings me joy. In other words, I am learning how to feel confident in my style. 

This should go for you, too! In case no one told you today, you’re doing amazing. You have a unique life that no one gets to live but you. Your story will be different from mine. Both on Instagram and in real life. And that is totally ok. Please do not think you are lagging behind anyone else!

About Instagram: it is supposed to be a place to share the good times, and there’s nothing more than that. Which is why I need to stay in my lane. I am a car in my own lane, going at my own pace. If I try to merge myself into another lane too quickly— you and I both know that’s never good. You have your own lane too, it is up to you how fast or how slow you want to move through life. 

Jazzy Tung

CU Boulder '27

Jazzy Tung is a writer for Her Campus at University of Colorado Boulder (HCCU), and is a part of its social media team. Currently, she is a sophomore at the University of Colorado Boulder, who is majoring in journalism and minoring in international relations. Jazzy has always loved being involved with school media: in middle and high school, she was on the yearbook team. In her junior year of high school, she attended the National Student Leadership Conference in Washington D.C. (American University) for communication studies. That only fueled her love for journalism even more! She was also the president of her high school's Creative Writing Club. Outside of school, Jazzy has a variety of interests. For example, she enjoys playing board and card games like UNO, spending time with friends and family, and surfing the internet for any interesting topic. Jazzy also has a large collection of notebooks in her room, most of which are from previous school years, that she saves in case she wants to write anything and everything later on. One of Jazzy's favorite hobbies, though, is stationery! She loves collecting pens, highlighters, sticky notes, and stickers.