I think I can speak for almost everyone about how we have felt influenced watching some sort of media– whether that be through social media or through cinema. Most of us have felt rather inspired seeing someone do something and felt the desire to become this person. Envy is our greatest enemy.
People tend to over-romanticize things they view in the media. A common occurrence I’ve seen are people that want to have a romantic relationship just like The Notebook. “Is love like in the movie The Notebook actually possible?” While The Notebook is one of the most critically acclaimed romance movies, it does possess some of the more toxic elements in a relationship- like how Noah hangs from a ferris wheel threatening to harm himself if Allie doesn’t go out with him, the explosive arguing, and how the idea of love can fix everything, even when the relationship is built on unhealthy dynamics that would not lead to the happy ending we saw from Noah and Allie in the real world.
We are constantly being bombarded with images, ideals, and lifestyles that are curated in the media to seem “perfect.” Even in advertisements, actors are shown from having a perfect, ideal life from a single product, when in reality, it is not the same as the advertisement. We are shaped to craft a perception of what it means to live a “good life,” but this often leads to a kind of internal struggle with ourselves where we feel compelled to live up to these unrealistic expectations instead of being our own true selves.
The desire to emulate what we see can distort our reality as we begin to measure our successes, relationships, and even our self-worth against fabrications. This phenomenon isn’t limited to just romantic relationships– it is also present in career aspirations, body images, and lifestyle choices. The problem is that these media portrayals often lack depth, ignoring the complexities and nuances of reality. Striving to become someone else diminishes the richness that comes from embracing our own imperfections and differences that makes us, us.
During my senior year of high school, my teacher assigned Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World, a novel that delves into a society in which you sacrifice personal freedoms and individuality for the sake of having “stability.” Everyone in this dystopian world is conditioned to think, behave, and even feel the same way, erasing the diversity of thought and experience that is essential for our own personal growth– somewhat mimicking how we as a society get easily influenced by sociological instances, such as groupthink. Without individuality, the characters in Brave New World live superficially, demonstrating the dangers of a society where conformity is the highest virtue.
On several social media platforms, micro-trends like “clean girl aesthetic” or “cottage core” have led many people to abandon their own personal style or preferences by convincing themself to fit into these fads in a quest for validation and a sense of belonging.
Personally, I have fallen victim to this as I feel like some things I believe I like are just because I succumbed to social pressures to value a certain mindset. I cannot give advice on how to avoid losing your individuality, as I am a seventeen-year-old and most teenagers are heavily influenced by others actions, by their idols, or honestly just their parents. But one thing that is important to keep in mind that I can tell you is to know that differences aren’t a bad thing, it is what makes us our own selves.