What does it mean to “find your calling?” Over the past three years, I have often found myself trying to find answers to this question. What even is a calling, and how do I know that’s really for me? After changing my major more than enough times throughout my collegiate career, I feel like I am running out of time to find out. I think this topic has become extremely challenging for me because I am a person who feels called to do just about everything.
Even though I feel like people choose different career paths for many different reasons, this is often contradicted at times when I meet people who want to go into a career path solely for the money. I grew up in a household where money was scarce, but generosity was plentiful. I was never raised in a big house, and I would only get one or two big Christmas presents every year. I was very used to not getting things that I would want — and working for everything I wanted. When I meet people who tell me that they only want to go into a certain career path so they can be well-off and overachieve the “American Dream,” I have a hard time understanding why. I always find that even though these people are dead set about going into a career for the profits, most of them have dreams of doing something else. Often it’s to be an airline pilot, or to become an educator. Careers that would, in my opinion, put the cubicle, corporate America, big money vision to shame.Â
For a long time, I wondered what it would be like to have complete and total stability since I never got to experience it growing up. I have always been someone to appreciate what I have rather than fantasizing about what I do not. I’ve never thought that I needed to go into a certain career path solely to have financial stability or prosper in wealth. In my opinion, the rich and ambient lifestyle doesn’t make up for anything that would bring me true happiness, like genuine connection or enjoyment of life. Sometimes I feel that it even overlooks the simplicity and beauty of a simple life. Of course it would be nice to make a ton of money right out the gate, and then retire early without having to worry about anything else for the rest of your life. I mean, who doesn’t want to retire early to travel the world, or experience everything life has to offer? However, I like competing and proving myself among the world of people out there, and I don’t think I would enjoy lacking a passion or career for the majority of my life. Life is kind of like a nice family board game for me: I don’t have to win, but I want to have fun and feel fulfilled while accepting the challenge.
Despite having this mindset, I always wonder what makes something your “calling” opposed to something you find passion in. What makes those two things different, and how do I know when I’ve found my calling? According to Oxford, the definition of calling is stated as: a strong urge toward a particular way of life or career; a vocation. This infers that your calling may not be what you are born to do, but something that you find suitable for your way of life. With this logic, the money-chasing career paths could be a calling to those who feel the need to provide financial support and stability to their families for the entirety of their lives. However, some may consider their calling to be something they find complete and utter enjoyment in. Maybe someone’s calling has something to do with where they have wanted to live their whole lives, or the sacrifices they are willing to make. Some people find their calling in helping others, or creating genuine connections with a community like nurses or teachers. There are people who find their calling in conquering great feats like mountaineers, and some don’t even make money!
I have no clue what my calling is; like I said before, I feel called to do just about everything. Like the teachers and nurses, I feel called to make genuine connections with people and strive to make a difference in people’s lives. However, like the financially stable admirers, I do not want to have the salary of a teacher, and unfortunately I lack the brains to do anything within the medical field. Similar to the mountaineers, there are things I feel naturally called to do, even though it may be a bit out of the box. However, my passions also are not as extreme as climbing Mount Everest, and I’m not sure if I’m ready to throw myself off a cliff.Â
Something that has always come naturally to me was singing and music in general. Throughout my life, my parents put a lot of pressure on me to do sports and be involved athletically, but joining choir, performing, and writing music had always been on my own agenda. When I was 7, I remember being able to hear a melody in my head, and from there, I would write my own music to that melody. Still to this day, I cannot explain the phenomenon. Sometimes in the night, I will arise from a dead sleep and reach for my phone or notebook to record a voice memo or write down lyrics to a melody that just appeared in my head while dreaming. Or often, this will happen while driving in the car, walking to class, or just being bored and hanging out around my house. It is so unexplainable that even my mom has attributed it to some type of ADHD, or that it must be some secondary unknown cognitive function.
Whenever someone asks me what I think my calling is, I cannot overlook the strange but sophisticated nature of these events. However, I am always hesitant to tell anyone about it. While growing up, my mom always told me that I needed to go to college and get a degree in something practical before even considering working full time on my music. This was hard for me, because I had never had something evolve so naturally before. Since I had to consider my options and was told to make my music a backup plan, I decided to try and find passions in other things. However, the passion for it never burned out in the back of my mind, and I continue to work on it today, in between classes and working. I often think about what I would be able to do if I devoted all of my time to my music, without the distractions of work or school.Â
I feel like whenever I listen to celebrities or music moguls talk about their careers, their advice is to always follow your dreams, and drop everything to pursue your passions. This makes me think that maybe a calling is not something that is supposed to be comfortable, but something that is supposed to challenge you and change your perspective on life. Maybe a calling is something that you’re so passionate about, that you give everything up for. Kind of like finding your true love. For now, the sacrifices I make are small, but maybe I’m supposed to fully let go, and jump head first into the unknown waters of life through my music career. No matter what I do, it’s always there, and continues to show up constantly in my day to day life. If you have something like this: a passion, a hobby that won’t let go of you, maybe this is how you know what your calling is. There must be a reason why it still sticks around with you.