What used to be a wonderful tradition and rite of passage that marked the sign of adulthood has turned into a late night snapchat or text message craze to “netflix and chill”. It is upsetting! However, it isn’t shocking with how our society functions today, all the romantic movies provide us with such high expectations of how men and women are supposed to act it breeds nothing, but disappointment for both parties. Dating used to be a special event where men and women would get dressed up and go out to dinner or plan activities to get to know each other, unfortunately that is not the case anymore. The persona that the male population is trying to emulate rewards one another for their conquests, detachment and rude sexually driven behavior, it is disgusting. Although this is not the entire male population, there are few men that are not participating in this fad, but it needs to stop. Even with all of this happening women are still accepting this behavior out of desperation to find the men that they see in the movies. Women and men are belittling one another, using each other for sex relations and temporary companionship; which makes both parties feel insecure and undesirable from the lack of effort and commit made by each party.
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Sadly, the change in the dating practices of our society is not the only problem we are dealing with. We are now required to ask a person if they are in a relationship when we begin to talk to them to verify their availablity and eligibity which truly shows how people are not placing the same values on relationships as they used to. It is disheartening that when a nice guy or girl approaches one another we question their motives and sincerity with their kind gestures. With all these new norms we are lacking trust in one another making it difficult to actually be happy and be in a functioning dating relationships. To clarify this is not only the male population that is ruining this tradition women are as well, women are participating in the same cheating, lying and detachment as men in fear of getting hurt. We have continued to allow this behavior to happen without making any changes which is why it is continuing to get worse. We need to understand that if you begin a “relationship” with someone who only wants to have a physical relations you can not get mad at them when you begin to develop feelings because they were honest with you from the beginning and you cannot force someone to be who they aren’t.
As a female in her early twenties I have seen the positives and negatives of being in a relationship in this age and am enjoying being single. I have yet to embark upon this new journey of putting myself out there and joining the dating world because I know how disappointing it has been for some of my male and female friends. If I could provide any advice to the female readers of this blog, I would say do not wait around for the guy or girl to come along to sweep you off your feet, if there is someone you are interested in go for it, however do not settle. Remember that “it is amazing how your life changes when you embrace the reality that you’re better than the life you’ve settled for.” No matter how attractive someone may be it is better to be alone than unhappy with how you are being treated, no person should make you feel inferior. If you are losing hope and you are afraid to be alone, be patient! The best way to handle things is to acknowledge that sometimes the best things happen when you least expect it. The person you are supposed to be with is out there and if someone is not willing to take the time to get to know you or treat you properly they are not worth your time. Â
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Times have changed we do not live in a male dominated world anymore, women need to take the initiative as well. If that means making the first move so be it, there is this constant power struggle in relationships to boost the egos of both sides, we need to set aside our pride and take chances. Next time you find yourself intrigued with someone and desire to get to know them, call them, dare I say text them or approach them in person to ask them to go out with you to get to know them. You never know what will happen it might result in your favor! We need to get back to the times where women and men would treat each other with respect and actually try to get to know each other.