Stardew Valley is my absolute favorite game of all time. I have almost 600 hours in this game, and haven’t gotten bored of it, even after over four years of playing it. I’ve done absolutely everything the game has to offer, even going as far as getting to 100% completion.
One of the important aspects of the game is getting to know the NPCs, including the 12 bachelors and bachelorettes that you can befriend, date and marry. It’s one of my favorite parts of this game, and every time I start a new file I think long and hard about which character to choose next. After my many many hours in this game, I have a firm grasp on each and every character, so here is my personal ranking of the twelve marriage options found within this amazing game, in order from least to most favorite.
12. Shane
I really wanted to like Shane. I really really did. His character arc has a lot of promise, but he falls short of glory. Shane’s story talks a lot about his depression and dependence on alcohol, and you get to help him move past this point in his life and be happy. However, after marrying Shane, a lot of this growth disappears and it’s implied that he returns to some of his old bad habits, like drinking and even having a messy room in his home. In my opinion, Shane is best as a friend, as you can get his development and be there for him, but you don’t have to watch him slide backward.
11. Alex
There’s nothing really wrong with Alex. But there’s nothing really right, either. He’s literally just some guy. In a live-action version of Stardew Valley, Alex would be played by Chris Pratt. He doesn’t grow much as a character. He peaked in high school as a football player. Need I say more?
10. Maru
Maru has never been that interesting to me. There’s nothing wrong with her, but her character isn’t that compelling in my opinion. We love a woman in stem, but I know Maru will always love her robots more than she loves me. She has her priorities straight.
9. Emily
Emily, like Maru, hasn’t ever been a character I’ve been super interested in. She’s very nice and loves clothes and fashion, and is supportive and kind. She’s a fan of crystals and you know that she loves astrology. She makes a better friend than a wife in my mind.
8. Elliott
I have very mixed feelings about Elliott. He’s an author, which is very impressive, but he’s also a bit stuck-up and way too formal for me. He does write a book and dedicate it to you which is very romantic, but since he’s 100% the type of man who would mansplain literature to me, he isn’t very high on my list.
7. Sebastian
Sebastian likes coding and Dungeons and Dragons. Need I say more? We’re getting to the middle point of this list, so here is the start of good characters that I just don’t have a lot of personal interest in. I like Sebastian’s character and I know we would get along very well, but he’s not my type. I can see myself playing DnD and talking about video games with Sebastian, but not much more. He does ride a motorcycle, so that’s cool.
6. Leah
I’m currently in the progress of marrying Leah. She loves the outdoors and is an artist. She even makes a sculpture for you. Her storyline is fun, as you get to figure out why she moved to Pelican Town. We love supporting local artists and helping Leah hold an art show is satisfying on its own, but it also gives her a chance to punch her toxic ex when they show up uninvited. Leah can even punch you herself if you choose the creepy dialogue option during your first heart event (I don’t know why you would, but it’s an option). What more could you want in a woman?
5. Harvey
Harvey is very sweet, but a little bland. He’s the town doctor and as such, always makes sure that you’re taking care of yourself. He reminds you to drink water and wear sunscreen. He loves planes but is scared of heights, and for his final heart event, he faces his fears and takes you on a hot air balloon ride. His willingness to be brave and try new things with you is adorable. He more than deserves a spot in my top five.
4. Abigail
Abigail is just cool. There’s no way around it. She’s (allegedly) the daughter of a wizard, has purple hair, likes video games, and wants to explore and adventure. She plays DnD with Sebastian, is in a band with Sam, and loves things that are a little creepy to most. She also eats rocks. Her heart events have a lot of great moments where you get to know her and her hopes and fears, and seeing her all over the map is always a pleasant surprise.
3. Penny
Penny is one of the sweetest people in town, despite what she’s been through. Her mom is an alcoholic and is not there for Penny, and she doesn’t have anyone else in the town that she’s close to. Despite all this, she is caring and gentle, works as the teacher for the children in town, and assists the older folks where she can. You can often find her in the library or under her favorite tree reading. She wants a better life for herself but makes the most of what she has. Her heart events are touching, and she’s the type of person you just want to help. Whenever I’ve married Penny, I’ve always loved her gentle demeanor, her inner fire, and all of the breakfasts she makes me. It’s so satisfying helping give her what she wants more than anything: a happy family.
2. Sam
Sam was the first character I ever married in Stardew Valley, so I’ll always have a soft spot for him. He’s a charming guy who enjoys skateboarding, video games, and being in a rock band. He’s often found practicing guitar or going to the beach with his little brother. His heart events scream high school-style rom-com, with events like watching his band play your favorite music and sneaking into his bedroom to sneak a kiss. It makes sense why I went for him first when I was 16 years old. He’s not really my type now, but he’s a fun character.
1. Haley
Haley is the love of my life. My sweetheart. My everything. Her character growth is great. She goes from a self-centered girl who doesn’t like living in her small town to someone who takes notice of the needs of other people and learns to love her tight-knit community. I love a good character progression, and seeing Haley go from rolling her eyes at people to genuinely smiling and having a good time makes her one of my favorites. Plus, she’s very pretty. Need I say more?