Let’s be real, breakups are crap. You share so much with the other person throughout your time together that putting that in the past can be so tough. Especially when the breakup ends so amicably, it’s hard to just stop talking to that person you’ve spent so much time with. But does staying friends after breaking up really work?
There are times when people can stay friends after a breakup, however, a lot of the time unfortunately it doesn’t work. Of course, staying friends with an ex is completely a personal preference and it may work for you but for others, it just isn’t as smooth sailing.
Let’s say you weren’t friends before you started dating and throughout the relationship, you were madly in love, the sex was amazing and the chemistry was so strong. Towards the end of the relationship that love faded, how do you become friends with someone who you only know that kind of love for? If you weren’t friends prior to entering the relationship, the only love you know for that person is the strong connection you felt for each other during your relationship and nothing else. That kind of feeling is hard to shake and bringing those feelings into a brand new relationship will cause tension and trust issues from the beginning.
Entering a new relationship and still being friends with your ex can be problematic for most. Your new partner may struggle to come to terms with the fact your ex is still in your life. Knowing the kind of bond and relationship you would have shared with her, your ex could cause issues for your new partner when it comes to trust. You’re not really giving that new relationship a chance to grow into something that could possibly be a forever thing.
There’s no shame in being civil with an ex. Say hi when you pass them on the street, maybe ask them how they’re doing when you meet them on a night out but continuing a close relationship with an ex can cause complications in your own personal life and the brand new relationship you may be stepping into. Seeing pictures of your ex or knowing what they’re up to all the time could cause your emotions to go all over the place, you guys would have ended things for a reason, there’s no point in constantly asking yourself “what if?”.
If you find yourself asking the what if’s, buts and maybes, it may be better and healthier for you to let the friendship go. No matter how much it may hurt at that very moment.