20 Life Lessons for 20 Years

I turned 20 this past Friday, and I wanted to share some of the wisdom I’ve learned in my two decades (if it can even be called wisdom!)

1. I believe that there is literally no point in doing anything if you’re going to be lukewarm about it. Be enthusiastic, find the fun and try hard in everything you do. 

2. My mental health is just as important as my physical health. Just like being sick, things don’t always go away on their own. Taking time to take care of myself is incredibly important, no matter the capacity. 

3. Relationships change. I’ve had people who used to play big roles in my life become more minor characters, and I’ve grown closer to people that I never thought I’d be close with. People will surprise you. 

4. Self depreciation might be “in” for my generation, but that absolutely does not mean I have to participate. It’s one thing to be humble, it’s another to tear yourself down for no reason. 

5. I love journaling. When I was younger, and kept journals, I always felt stupid and girly and dumb for wanting to have a place to vent. But now that I have my thoughts and memories recorded, it’s really interesting to go back and look at how much I’ve grown as a person. Not to mention the feelings of peace and relaxation that journaling brings me in the moment.

6. That being said, it’s in no way dumb to be in touch with your emotions. I’m not sure why it’s “cool” to not have feelings, but that just doesn’t work for me. I have lots of feelings, all the time, and I’ve decided I’m no longer afraid of them. They help me figure out what I’m doing correctly and what I’m doing incorrectly in life. 

7. I might be 20, but I can’t take myself too seriously yet. Yes, I need to think about my future, but I can’t skip this phase of my life. I’m still in college, and there’s a fine line between enjoying my life and working and wishing it all away. 

8. When I do think about my future, I can’t get caught up in the details when I think about my future. I need to think big picture. It’s okay not to have everything figured out.

9. I will never be able to please everyone. Its simply unrealistic. By taking care of my own needs I will sometimes disappoint or upset other people, but there are times when thats okay. 

10. Taking a break is okay too. Sometimes it feels like the only thing that will make me feel less stressed is just getting things done, but when I’ve just been going for a long time, I can fall into a place where I’m just not productive anymore. Sometimes I do need to eat chocolate and watch movies with my friends for a little while, and then go back to work with a fresh mind. 

11. Just because something is hard does not mean I should turn away from it. Some situations are scary, but once I tackle them, I’ll feel more satisfied.

12. Getting satisfaction from doing something well is one of the absolute best feelings in life. That makes trying really hard fun. 

13. That being said, sometimes at the end of the day I need to just think, “Okay, I did what I could do today. I’ll try again tomorrow,” and that’s okay.

14. Everything is figure-out-able.

15. Comparing myself to other people is a recipe for disaster when it comes to my mental health. I know not everyone struggles with this, but many people do, and that’s why I’m voicing it. One of the best ways to combat this is thinking about what I’m grateful for. I have so many wonderful people in my life, and so many good opportunities available to me. I just have to seek them out. 

16. It is completely okay to ask for help. From friends, from family, from professors, from anyone who can help. There’s no reason I have to struggle with something by myself. I don’t have to be an island. 

17. There is beauty in vulnerability. In the past year, I’ve published more personal writing and had a photography exhibit on display in the art building. Both of these things required me to really open up and think about things that were uncomfortable for me. But I grew from these experiences in so many ways, and it was completely worth it to me. 

18. The moments that hurt the most will also teach you the most.

19. Celebrate little things. All the time. If there’s a chance to have some fun, take it! Life is full of hard things, so take advantage of the happy things too. 

20. I must never, ever stop dancing. I can’t let anything take away my fire, my soul, that happy attitude that makes me who I am. Because really, that’s all I’ve got. 

I believe that there is literally no point in doing anything if you’re going to be lukewarm about it. Be enthusiastic, find the fun, and try hard in everything. 

My mental health is just as important as my physical health. And just like being sick, things don’t always go away on their own. Taking time to take care of myself is incredibly important, no matter in what capacity.

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