We’ve all heard the phrase: “Effortless perfection.” These two simple words heavily influence Duke society, and I say heavily because the connotation of this phrase that has burdened many students.
Effortless perfection seems to be a Duke motto, right alongside “Work hard, play hard” or “Go to Hell, Carolina.” The interpretation of this phrase is evident in the actions of students on campus. Duke students are passionately driven in both our academic and extracurricular endeavors. Unarguably, this passion and drive is what set our applications apart and why we were accepted here in the first place. But, sometimes, being surrounded by hundreds of passionate students can be overwhelming, and even isolating. Sometimes, it seems like most Duke students successfully balance being President of three clubs, acing all of their hardest classes, partying the nights away at Shooters every weekend, and making new friends everywhere they turn— and all without breaking a sweat. Meanwhile, I’m just taking life hour by hour… how do they do it?
First, I think it’s important to realize that no one is perfect. No one simply breezes through all four years of college. No one graduates without experiencing some form of stress, pain, and struggle. Even Ms. Perfect has a crappy day and goes back to her room to drown her sorrows in a pint of gelato and a pound of Heav Buff’s wings.
Second, realize that everyone is different. The individuality of Duke students is what makes our society diverse and interesting. Yeah, Sally may be involved in more clubs than you. But, that doesn’t make her superior. You may be more introverted than your friends, or you may have fewer friends than the people around you, but your introversion does not make you inferior. It makes you, you. Realize that everyone has their own strengths, and your best may look different than someone else’s. Accept your differences, and see them as strengths rather than flaws.
Lastly, the responsibility to make Duke a better environment is up to us students. We must collectively decide that the misconception of effortless perfection is harming our society and its members: us. We must say that it is okay to not be okay and that it is okay to not have your life together every single day. We must say that it is acceptable to admit that we are struggling and that reaching out for help and support is admirable. We must recognize effortless perfection as a myth while also establishing our own truth: that every student is a valued member of Duke society, no matter how little or how much they involve themselves at any given time. And not only must we say and believe these statements; our actions must also reflect them.
I encourage you to tackle this week with a commitment to being perfectly imperfect.