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Dating Advice from a College Girl

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Elizabethtown chapter.

Hello ladies! Whether you’ve had a serious relationship, or have never been on a first date, we can all learn more about dating! While no one is an expert on love, there are a few dating tips I would love to share with you today, in the hopes of helping you develop a healthy relationship. There are certain things to look for before you start dating your crush.

1. Does he know you exist?

Hey, if he does not know who you are, it’s up to you to change that! If you know him from classes, your hometown, sports, or any other location where you physically see him, find a way to actually “meet” him. Have a small conversation by talking about silly things like, “I think you’re in my English class. What do you think of our paper topic?” Or if you know he is a soccer star say something like, “Hi, do you play a sport at College?” If he says yes, ask him about the sport he plays, what position, last game, etc. Also, you can just start by saying “hi” when you see him. If he reacts positively, think about actually talking to him another time. It’s completely up to you! If he is online and you have a crush on him, try to follow or friend him. Depending on the circumstances, try and chat with him. Please be careful when talking to people online! If he asks you weird, concerning, and threatening things, do not continue to talk to him. Please be safe, and protect yourselves ladies.

2. Look up his social media accounts

Yes, I said it. I’m personally giving you permission to “stalk” him on the internet. This is what I like to consider “healthy research.” The reason I recommend this is because you can learn a lot about a person simply by scrolling through their pictures, posts, and looking at their comments. Does he seem like someone who shares your interests and values? Or is it completely different from how you present yourself online? Is his page full of profanity and illegal activities? Is yours professional and positive? These are some things to keep in mind when entering the “dating pool.” I am not saying that your crush has to be a male version of you, but keep in mind the things that you would and would not be comfortable with in a relationship.

3. Does he initiate conversations with you?

Did he try to contact you on social media, ask for your number, or come up and talk to you? If he does, these are definitely good signs. If he is shy, this will be hard for him. Make yourself approachable. Just be yourself, and appear open to conversations. P.S. Your crush is more likely to approach you if you are alone than if you are surround by a group of girls. If he does not strike up a conversation with you, it’s okay! If you’re feeling bold, talk to him, ask for his number, follow or friend him on social media. If you decide to do this, see how he responds to you. Does he seem willing to talk to you, or does he try to avoid you? Be aware of his verbal and nonverbal cues. If he positions himself far away from you, this is not the best sign. If he seems distracted or you notice him looking around when you are talking to him, he probably does not share your feelings. Please note that some guys are terribly awkward and want to talk and interact with you, but do not know how. Fear not, just be patient and try to talk to him in small amounts. Keep conversations quick, positive, and cheerful.

4. How does he treat you when it’s just the two of you? (If you hangout just the two of you!)

Does he make eye contact with you when you are speaking? Now, some guys may be shy, or there may be cultural differences between you and him. With that being said, does he look at you and genuinely seem interested in what you are saying? Does he nod as you speak, or make hand gestures, or respond to your thoughts? Or does he sit there like a sack of rotted potatoes? Honestly girls, you are better off without a man who doesn’t bother to listen to you! Does he actively participate in the conversation? Does he ask you questions, or note common interests between you two? Does he smile, laugh, or seem happy when speaking to you? If he is interested in you, he will probably make connections with your interests. He may suggest that you do something together (this is always a good sign!). He might ask you to talk about past experiences. These things show that he cares about you, and wants to learn more about you!

Please keep in mind that every girl and guy is different! I hope these tips help. Best of luck finding the guy that makes your heart happy. :)

 

Kristen Wade

Elizabethtown '19

Kristen Wade is a senior Communications major with a concentration in PR and a minor in Graphic Design at Elizabethtown College. Kristen loves hiking, shopping, and baking. After graduation, Kristen hopes to work in digital marketing.