We often see a female’s perspective on the hardships of pursuing a long distance relationship, but rarely do we ever see a male’s point of view. The purpose of this article is to highlight the impact of a long distance relationship on the male partner, and determine whether or not women tend to grow more attached to long distance relationships than men. All of the information in this article was taken from a survey that was posted to many different college and university Facebook pages in order to get as many diverse submissions as possible. The information taken from this survey was received by men whose ages ranged from 15-48, and who came from states ranging from coast to coast. The point of this article isn’t to discount the female’s perspective, but rather to give men a way of describing their experiences and opinions through the use of a noninvasive, completely anonymous source. We hope that both men and women can easily connect to, and take into consideration, the values of their own relationships!
Submission Information:
The majority of the submissions that we received were from high school and college students. However, about 9% were from men over the age of 30, who had either terminated the relationship, or ended up marrying their partner. These stats were collected from men living in the states of Maine, Massachusetts, Ohio, Illinois, Alabama, North Dakota, Florida, Maryland, New Hampshire, New Jersey, and Connecticut.
Of our submissions that were students, a little over 40% of them said they were in college, making this article easy for college students to relate to!
Question One:
Almost 60% of submissions said that they met their partners in the workplace, while they were out with friends, or doing some other kind of social activity. So remember, keep your options open, because you could meet someone anywhere…
Question Two:
Shockingly, from a survey where over half of the submissions were given by college-aged men, a whopping 67% said that their long distance relationships were caused by their partner attending another school, college, or university. There were a few submissions by men who were in long distance relationships because they were overseas fulfilling their military duties. For all of you men who go through an emotional struggle while being away from your family overseas defending our country, we sincerely thank you!
Question Three:
Over 50% of the submissions said that some form of video chat was the best way for them to communicate with their partner. Imagine trying to do this in a time before technology: over 50% would probably say that a carrier pigeon was the most effective way to tell their ladies what babes they were… But on the other hand, one man commented that “Good morning and night texts are the most important things to do every day. Set up a day each week to video chat as well.”
Question Four:
Almost 30% of our submissions noted seeing their partner at least once a month. I don’t know about you, but that sounds pretty rough to me. Be that as it may, one of our submissions offered some great advice on how to keep the spark alive in that relationship: , “Long distance relationships are difficult. Each partner has to be completely devoted and understand the sacrifices which come with the distance. Although my long distance relationship didn’t work out, I believe that a strong couple could easily make it through several years with good communication and a strong level of trust and commitment.”
Question Five:
Many of our submissions said that the most difficult part of their long distance relationship, was the lack of physical intimacy. “Sexual needs can be difficult to fulfill in long distance relationships, and we’re all human, so we all have that need. I suggest that both partners keep an open mind and discuss the necessary details of making sure those needs are met, however both partners feel that they need to be met.” – Quote from one of our anonymous submissions.
Question Six:
Exactly half of our submissions noted that they were in fact still in their relationships! Whether they were still in a long distance relationship, or they were finally together forever, we love to hear that these relationships are still going strong! But for those who said that sadly, they’re relationship just couldn’t last, over half of them said that it was in fact their partner that broke it off! Now, whether our couples were male-male or male-female, we don’t know, but we can assume it’s pretty safe to say us ladies aren’t the only one’s getting our hearts broken.
Question Seven:
For our guys who just couldn’t push through, the majority of them said their breakup was caused by stress and high emotional struggles. Loss of interest also seemed to be a popular answer as well. Many men struggle with the lack of physical intimacy, which is perfectly understandable for us college kids.
Question Eight:
Now, because we don’t usually get to ask such personal and invasive questions, we just had to see how difficult it was on their emotions to endure a long distance relationship. And luckily, our majority said that they never experienced depression as a result of their LDR, which is something we like to hear! But unfortunately for many, depression and thoughts of suicide can be one of the many hurdles faced by those of us who are willing to put our entire selves into our relationships. Just remember, the most important thing at this time in our lives is making sure that we stay happy and healthy. And more often than not, ensuring our happiness comes with making difficult choices that may not only affect you. But, that’s just how it is. If you’re experiencing these kinds of negative emotions, please reach out to those who are willing to help. It might be easier than you’d think.
Conclusion:
So, what are we to make of all of this information? Maybe some of us just need reassurance that we aren’t the only ones who go through these problems, and sometimes we all just need to step back and look at the bigger picture. Many of our submissions made sure to add that in fact, their long distance relationships furthered their respect for love and relationships more than they had ever expected. One of our submissions noted that the long distance made their relationship stronger: “Always know that you’ll be able to see her soon. Distance makes the heart grow fonder.” I know it’s kind of a cliche, but it’s completely true.
For our couples who are able to handle these kinds of relationships, we salute you! Stay strong, ladies and gents.