Living on your own always sounds like such a great idea until you are actually alone, in the middle of a city, and just barely getting by paycheck to paycheck. This summer was a real test for me – it challenged me in every aspect of life and made me realize I cannot afford that boujee city lifestyle.
My adventure began on a Monday when I got an offer from an internship in Boston and I had less than 24 hours to give them an answer. Of course I wanted this internship, in fact, I needed to live in Boston for the summer. Between havoc at home and no desire to be stuck in my usual part-time summer gigs, Boston would be the escape I needed. Living in Boston would be a brilliant idea…here are some lessons I learned the hard way.
First lesson: Do not settle in on an apartment you found in less than 24 hours. What can I say? I was absolutely DESPERATE. To be honest, I never had been on “the Hill” in Boston during the daytime. Let’s just say it’s not as fun and glamorous during the day as it is (so I thought) at night. I settled in on a place that was cheap, seemingly clean, and close to public transportation. Plus, my roommates seemed totally chill. What could possibly go wrong?
Second lesson: Not everything is as it seems. Long story short, my living situation went from a paradise to satan’s home in a matter of no time. Bed bugs. Cockroaches. Untidy roommates. Sex addict roommate. Psycho roommates. Again, do NOT settle on an apartment you found in less than 24 hours.
Third lesson: Do not let anyone control you. I have never felt so trapped before. I was depressed and alone. My roommates were anti-social and it was as if I was walking on eggshells all the time around them. For someone who loves people from all walks of life, I loathed these girls! Every weekend I escaped home or to NYC because it was a sanctuary for me. I worked long days just so that I wouldn’t have to be sitting in my apartment. As someone who preaches about being a strong independent woman who doesn’t take any bull****, I sure did lose touch of Jamie for a minute. I allowed these people to treat me like I was a child. Never again.
Fourth lesson: Living on your own is expensive. I lived on a 1,000-1,200 calorie diet all summer, not by choice, but because I had no time to eat and couldn’t even afford to eat for that matter. Between purchasing food, transportation, rent for a dump – I was as broke as it gets. Not once did I ask my parents for money because this was my choice to live in Boston, and I thought I could do it all on my own. If you want something, make it happen yourself. But when people say city living is expensive, it’s no joke lol.
Fifth lesson: Do not be afraid to ask for favors. I remember this phone call vividly: me panicking on the phone to my Dad because I had just found out the exterminator found bed bugs in my room and I needed to diddy-bop out of there ASAP. Between the bites on my body to risking more of my belongings getting infested, I didn’t care where I ended up so long as I wasn’t living in that room. In one day I quit one of my jobs, asked my internship for a HUGE favor, packed up what was left at 11pm and moved to NH to my Dad’s. I had to throw away about $300 worth of things that I had earned for myself. I don’t think I stopped crying about it up until recently. I felt like a failure.
Sixth lesson: Sometimes the least glamorous situations bring the best opportunities. Although I had to vacate a month early and the slumlords refused to give back my August rent, I can’t say I totally regret my move to Boston this summer. The people I met in my jobs are incredible people. This was a life lesson. I lost a lot of money and confidence, and I let the most irrelevant people tear me down, but the learning experience I got was priceless. I have nothing but gratitude for my internship; the amount of first-hand experience and skills I have gained would not have come out of living back home. If anything, I did a pretty good job at playing both ends of it this summer: being there for my family while still working towards my career.
So thank you to my psycho roommates, to my wonderful jobs, and to my “24-hour” plan to move to Boston. You all taught me a thing or two about life, the good and the bad. I may have ironed my clothes with a straightener this summer, been eaten alive by bugs, but I still came out on top winning (minus my $725 GBM refuses to refund me for). Because now I know my self-worth and that I will be successful regardless of the situations I endure, and that sometimes in life we encounter some really sh*tty people and situations we just have to push through.
But for real, can we start a petition to get my rent back?