How do I escape hookup culture at this school?
Dear Anonymous,
Don’t try to escape something that’s inevitable because you’ll find yourself hating college. The normalcy of hook up culture on college campuses is something you can’t avoid, but, that doesn’t mean it has to be normal for you. At the end of the day, everyone is looking for companionship, we all just satisfy our need for it in different ways. There are going to be people who prefer fleeting relationships and those who will always ache for more. People find the right path in life and relationships by testing out the waters and making mistakes. I believe the best way to answer your question is to tell you that in this world of “hook up culture”, every person is looking to fill an empty space. Do I agree that hooking up is the best way to go about it? No, but, for some reason, it has become the norm. Instead of looking at in a negative light, think about how no one in this world wants to be lonely. In a place where developing any kind of relationship is hard, I think people find relief in any form of companionship even if it just lasts for a night.
However, not everyone finds this companionship in a night or even wants to. Some people get it right the first time and every time. They find great guys or girls and they go on dates, become partners, live happily ever after, etc., etc. But, for the majority, they’re trying to figure out who they are, who they like, and how in the hell to find genuine companionship. You’re “over” hookup culture, and I don’t blame you, but instead of trying to escape it, realize that it may be someone’s way of figuring life out. If you don’t want to be a part of it then you’re ahead of everyone else and I applaud you for that. Truthfully, if you don’t want to be a part of the “hook up culture”, then don’t be. You are in control of yourself and your actions. Ask the guy you like, out on a date, don’t just go back to his room to “Netflix and chill”. You have the power to change the “hook up culture” for yourself.
Much Love,
A Fellow Gull Xoxo