As we begin November, the clocks have gone back, days are getting shorter, and the air is colder, which means only one thing: it’s officially cuffing season. This phrase, made popular by SZA’s second appearance on SNL with her skit CUFFING SEASON, reinforces the pressure to keep warm through the colder winter months with body heat to keep the heating bill down. It’s the season of dates, cuddles, and romance, yet is it all deception?
For what may be cuffing season for one is love bombing for the other. As of the 30th of March, when British summer time officially begins, you all of a sudden find yourself single and looking for the cheapest flights out to Ibiza for you and your friends. Therefore, this is a warning. If you have noticed your Hinge coming back to life after a long, dry summer, it’s because the panic for a ‘relationship’ has set in. As the term comes to an end, the pressure to find a nice partner to bring back for Christmas and share a New Year’s kiss with sets in, therefore commencing the beginning of cuffing season and the end of Hot Girl Summer. Here are the signs to suggest cuffing season has begun:
1. Dating Apps
As I previously mentioned, if post Halloweekend you have noticed more activity on your Hinge, Tinder and Raya (if you’re lucky enough), be warned this is the first sign of cuffing season. People want to test the waters 6 weeks prior to Christmas to ensure the perfect fit to impress their family with after being hounded all year for not settling down with a ‘nice young woman.’ Therefore, you must spend even more time on these apps trying to decipher whether this man is the one you will marry in Lake Como or merely an accessory to the hideous Christmas jumper he has worn for five consecutive years.
2. Increase in Effort
Following on from the increase in swipe rights, there may have been a talking stage or situationship that has been on the table for quite some time now, and all of a sudden, the effort has increased – quicker replies, more compliments, talking about the future! Beware, this may be a ploy to trick you into a false sense of security of a long-term relationship, whereas, in reality, he just wants someone warm to cuddle at night. If he didn’t like you enough to have a fireworks display date, why should the Christmas markets perk his interest. Be cautious that this change of effort may not be as innocent as it seems.
3. Return of the ex
This point should come with a warning: if your ex comes anywhere near you between now and January 1st STAY AWAY! The feeling of nostalgia sets in as they realise that your relationship this time last year is what created the Christmas spirit, and they are praying for a Christmas miracle that your relationship will return on the 1st of December, just like an elf on the shelf. But do not believe it. Isn’t it ironic that they weren’t missing you all summer whilst they probably cosplayed Saltburn, going to DnB raves wearing a bucket hat that has never been washed and having consecutive lads holidays in which the catchphrase of the trip was ‘what happens in Maga stays in Maga.’ If a notification from your ex appears, be careful- they’ve probably had enough of their mum telling them that they’ve lost the one and how grandad is so sad that there will be an empty chair for boxing day leftovers because you aren’t there.
4. Quarantine
This is arguably one of the biggest clues as to whether you have become victim to cuffing season, and that is if you and your situationship do not leave the house. All effort has gone out the window. If you are on your third screening of The Holiday, I hate to say it, you are officially a victim. An increase in indoor activities doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing. If anything, it’s cute: date nights by the fire, hot chocolates, roasting marshmallows. However, if your relationship has turned into film friends who cuddle, this is not ok. Christmas is more than just the movies, and quite frankly, that is the bare minimum. Two strangers can watch movies together! They just want a warm cuddle in such cold times therefore, you could be anyone! If there is nothing personal to you, they are not doing this for you, so be warned an increase of laziness from someone who is not even officially your partner does not deserve to have matching Christmas pyjamas with you.
Although I must say some moments in British winter time may not be as deceitful as I have suggested and acts of effort and kindness from talking stages and exes can be genuine, I have just merely provided you with some of the key signs of cuffing season as not all cosy moments in this time are what they seem. Cuffing season is created through lust, desire and companionship through the cold, long and dark months, so therefore, has an expiry date of 4 months, making it a very temporary contract. If casual and short-term is what you are looking for, ignore this whole article and take whatever this season throws at you and cure the seasonal loneliness. So, while navigating these months, just remember that intentions are not as black and white as they are in the summer and that connections formed now may have ulterior motives, so approach this time with caution and hope that you may be the couple to break the curse.